From: https://youtube.com/watch?v=He4Ge9-SF1U

Context: Throughout this transcript, Bhante Vimalaramsi is the speaker unless otherwise indicated.

one of the interesting things that

happens with the discourses and the

middle banks things is they they might

have two discourses with the same name

but they'll say this one's the big one

and this one's the small one and the

small one is almost always bigger than

the big one don't ask me I have no idea

how that works

thus have I heard on one occasion the

blessed one was living in Swati in

jeta's grove anathapindika's park then

when a brahmin pinga lakota went to the

blessed one and exchanged greetings with

him when the courteous and amiable talk

was finished he sat down at one side and

said to the blessed one master Gautama

there are these refuses and brahmins

each the head of an order the head of a

group the teacher of a group a

well-known and famous founder of a sect

regarded by many as a saint it goes

through a bunch of names and I'm not

going to do that they have they have

they all had direct knowledge as they

claimed or none of them had direct

knowledge or have some of them had

direct knowledge and some not enough

Brahmin let this be have they all had

direct knowledge as they claimed or have

none of them had direct knowledge it or

have some of them had

direct knowledge and some not I shall

teach you the Dhamma Brahman listen and

attend closely to what I shall say

basically the Buddha wasn't interested

in gossip basically what this is saying

he wasn't interested in comparing other

people

well let's speculate whether this one

has it has this degree of enlightenment

or what so he always when he was asked

these kinds of questions he always says

I'm gonna teach you the Dhamma you

decide for this other stuff for yourself

because it doesn't really matter yes sir

the Brahmin replied the Blessed One said

this suppose Brahma Brahma a man meeting

heartwood seeking heartwood wandering in

search of heartwood came to a great tree

standing possessed of heartwood passing

over its heartwood its sapwood its inner

bark its outer bark he would cut off the

twigs and leaves and take them away

thinking that they were heartwood then a

man with good sight seeing him might say

this good man did not know the heartwood

the sapwood the inner bark the outer

bark were the twigs and leaves

thus while needing heartwood seeking

heartwood wandering in search of

heartwood he came to a great tree

standing possessed of heartwood passing

over the heartwood its sapwood its inner

bark it's outer bark he cut off the

twigs and leaves and took them away

thinking they were heartwood whatever it

was this good man had to make with

heartwood his purpose will not be served

suppose a man needing heartwood and

seeking heartwood wandering in search of

heartwood can

to a great tree standing possessed of

heartwood passing over the heartwood its

sapwood and its inner bark he would cut

off the outer bark and take it away

thinking it was heartwood and we keep

going on repeating over and over again

suppose a man made in heartwood passing

over heartwood and it SAP would he would

cut off the inner bark and take it away

thinking it was heartwood suppose a man

needing heartwood passing over its

heartwood he would cut off the SAP wood

and take it away thinking it was

heartwood suppose the man needing

heartwood seeking heartwood wandering in

search of heartwood came upon a great

tree standing possessed of heartwood

cutting off only its heartwood he would

take it away knowing that it was

heartwood then a man with good sight

seeing him might say this good man knew

the heartwood the sapwood the inner bark

the outer bark and twigs and leaves thus

while meeting heartwood seeking

heartwood wandering in search of

heartwood he came to a great tree

standing possessed of heartwood cutting

off only its heartwood he took it away

knowing it was heartwood whatever it was

this good man had to make with heartwood

his purpose will be served so to brahman

here's some clansmen goes forth out of

the out of faith from the home life into

the homeless considering I'm a victim of

birth aging and death of sorrow

lamentation pain grief and despair I'm a

victim of suffering a prey to suffering

surely an ending of this whole mass of

suffering can be known when he has gone

forth thus he acquires gain honour and

renown he is pleased with

honour and renown and his intention is

fulfilled on account of it he nods

himself in disparages others thus I have

gained honour and renown but these other

monks are unknown of no account so he

arouses no desire to act he makes no

effort for the realization of those

other states that are higher and more

sublime than gain honour and renown he

hangs back and slackens I say that this

person is like the man made in heartwood

who came to a great tree standing

possessed of heartwood and passing over

the heartwood and sapwood its inner bark

and outer bark cut off his twigs and

leaves and took it away thinking it was

heartwood and so whatever it was he had

to make with heartwood his purpose would

not be served here Brahman some clansmen

goes forth out of faith from the home

life into the homeless considering I am

a victim of Aging in depth of sorrow

lamentation pain grief in despair I'm a

victim of suffering afraid to suffering

surely an end of this whole mass of

suffering can be known when he has gone

forth

thus he acquires gain honour and renown

he is not pleased with being honour and

renown and

intention is not fulfilled he does not

on account of it laud himself and

disparage others he aroused this desire

to act and he makes an effort for the

realization of those other states that

are higher and more sublime than gain

honour and renown he does not hang back

in slacking he achieves the attainment

of virtue he is pleased with the

attainment of virtue and his intention

is fulfilled on a counter that he loves

himself and disparages others thus I am

virtuous of good character but those

other monks are immoral of evil

character so he arouses no desire to act

he makes no effort for the realization

of those other states that are higher

and more sublime and then the attainment

of virtue he hangs back and slackens I

say that this man is like the man

needing heartwood who passing over its

heartwood its sapwood and its inner bark

cut off the outer mark and took it away

thinking it was heartwood so whoever was

whatever it was he had to make with the

heartwood his purpose will not be served

here Brahmans son clansmen go forth out

of faith from the home life into the

homeless considering I'm a victim of

birth aging and death of sorrow

lamentation pain grief in despair I'm a

victim of suffering a prey to suffering

surely an ending of this whole mass of

suffering can be known when he has gone

forth thus he acquires gain honour and

renown he's not pleased with the

honor and rebound and his intention is

not fulfilled he achieves the attainment

of virtue he's pleased with the

attainment of virtue but his intention

is not fulfilled he does not on account

of it laud himself in disparage others

he arouses desire to act and he makes an

effort for the realization of those

other states that are higher and more

sublime than the attainment of virtue he

does not hang back and slacken he

achieves the attainment of this says

concentration but this kind of

concentration is the concentration you

need when you are reciting sutas so this

is not the same kind of concentration as

a meditation concentration it's what you

get with when you do your rope

memorizing over and over he's pleased

with the attainment of concentration and

his intention is fulfilled on account of

it he loves himself and disparages

others I'm concentrated my mind is

unified but these other monks are

unconcentrated with their minds astray

so he arouses no desire to act he makes

no effort for the realization of those

other states higher and more sublime

than the attainment of concentration he

hangs back in slackens I say that this

person is like a man needing Hartwood

who passing over its heartwood and it's

AK would cut off the inner bark and took

it away thinking it was heartwood so

whatever it was that he had to make with

heartwood his purpose will not be served

here Brahmin some clansmen goes forth

out of faith from the whole knife into

the homeless considering I'm a victim of

birth aging and death of sorrow

lamentation pain grief in despair I'm a

victim of suffering a prey to suffering

surely an ending of this one massive

suffering can be known when he has gone

forth thus he acquires being honour and

renown he's not pleased with gained

honor and rebound and his intention is

not fulfilled he achieves the attainment

of virtue he's pleased with the

attainment of virtue but his intention

is not fulfilled he achieves the

attainment of concentration he's pleased

with the attainment of concentration but

his intention is not fulfilled he does

not unaccounted it lauded himself and

disparage others he arouses desire to

act and he makes an effort for the

realization of those other states that

are higher and more sublime than the

attainment of concentration he does not

hang back in slacking he achieves

knowledge and vision what we're talking

about here is the deep understanding

that comes from listening to Dhamma

talks

you can get to the first order the

second stage of enlightenment by

listening and understanding what the

Dhamma talks are start showing you one

of the reasons that the Buddha was

continually saying listen and attend

closely because he was letting everybody

know that they had the potential to

deeply understand what he was talking

about and with that all doubt would

disappear belief that rites and rituals

would lead to deep states of

understanding that disappears and the

belief that there is a personal self

that will disappear you start seeing

everything as being in person so just by

listening to the dhamma talk so you can

get knowledge and vision you can see how

things work by listening very

attentively and

understanding how the process of minds

attention moving from one thing to

another actually does work just about

every retreat I wind up reading one

particular suit and it's a challenge to

read it but the reason that I read it is

because it's probably the most powerful

suta that I know of

it's really really very powerful and I

took out all of the dot-dot-dot and

there is a lot of repetition in it but

after listening to that the sitting that

you have right after that is generally

quite good because it really really do

deeply understand how everything works

if you can listen with that kind of a

mind that's very attentive even though

there's a lot of repetition in it it'll

start to sink in

and you can at that moment really

realize ah this is the way it works and

you can become enlightened that's why I

like that suit

okay here Brahmin son clansmen goes

forth out of faith from the home knife

into the homeless considering I'm a

victim of birth aging and death of

sorrow lamentation pain grief and

despair I'm a victim of suffering

mccraty to suffering surely an ending of

this whole mass of suffering can be

known when he's gone forth thus he

acquires being honour and renown he's

not pleased with being honour and renown

and his intention is not fulfilled he

achieves the attainment of virtue he's

pleased with the attainment of virtue

but his intention is not fulfilled he

achieves the attainment of concentration

he's pleased with the attainment of

concentration but his intention is not

fulfilled he achieves knowledge and

vision he's pleased with knowledge and

vision but his intention is not

fulfilled he does not on account of that

law himself and disparage others he

arouses desire to act and he makes an

effort for the realization of those

other states that are higher and more

sublime than knowledge and new and he

does not hang back and slacken but what

are the states that are higher and more

sublime than knowledge and vision here

Brahman quite secluded from show

pleasure saluted from unwholesome states

in terms of on in abides in the first

jhana which is accompany by thinking and

examining thought with joy and happiness

born of seclusion this is a state higher

and more sublime than

knowledge and vision that's the key that

tells you that it's not the

concentration for you and collected and

I'm not referring to meditation no but

there is understanding there is the

understanding of the process because an

honor to does it mentions that you when

you start out first your precepts

develop your virtue then start developed

well generosity version and then virtue

and then meditation and that's how they

brought their yes imagine that it's

consistent it'll be patient when you're

secluded from sensual pleasures that

mean you're not pulled to the central

pleasures that means while you're

sitting in meditation you close your

eyes the sensual pleasure of seeing as

you're being secluded from it if a sound

occurs your mind goes to that sound

you've let that sound be it doesn't

matter whether it's other people talking

or music or loved songs whatever happens

and car going by it doesn't matter you

allow that sound to be there but now you

don't pay attention to it and you relax

and you smile

come back to your meditation it happens

at all of the sense doors seeing hearing

tasting touching feeling and mind so

anytime you let go of the sensual

pleasures you're letting go of being

interested what that sensual pleasure is

and grabbing on to it and identifying

with it you're letting it be there by

itself now this is especially true with

thoughts thoughts are just thoughts

they're not your thoughts they're not my

thoughts they're just thoughts and we

have to treat them that way anytime you

start to get involved in the content of

the thought that leads directly to your

suffering so you have to be able to

recognize when your mind is distracted

and you might be distracted when you

first start out you might be distracted

for a period of time a few minutes and

that's okay but as soon as you remember

that's part of mindfulness as soon as

you remember that you're not on your

object of meditation then you let go of

the thoughts and let them be there by

themselves even if you're in

mid-sentence no matter how important it

seems that you should be involved in the

thinking just let it go

and smile and come back to the

loving-kindness and make another way for

your happiness

now sometimes you barely get a wish for

your happiness before your mind gets

distracted again that's fine when you

notice that let it be relaxed

it doesn't matter how active your mind

is or how much your mind wants to think

about this or that you're most

interested in seeing how Minds attention

from being on your object of meditation

if you get caught up in the thinking

about that means that you're grabbing on

to it and there is the desire to control

okay so you have to let go

our habitual tendency I mean I've been

living for 60 years now I've had some

real wacko habitual tendencies because

every time this kind of feeling came up

I always acted that way and it was like

it was like the such an automatic thing

that I wasn't even aware that I was

acting that way I thought that's the way

I was supposed to be but as you start

noticing that habitual tendency and

letting it be and relaxing coming back

to your object of meditation relaxing is

absolutely central to this practice you

can't say I can't say it often enough

you have to relax and the relaxing is

letting go of that tension and tightness

in your head when you let go of that

tension and tightness in your head you

let go of tension and tightness in your

mind when you let go of tension and

tightness in your mind you let go of

being clouded with your observation your

mind is pure your mind is bright your

mind is very very alert but there's no

thinking to stop you from seeing what's

happening in the present moment and you

bring them that mind back to your object

so this is a very necessary part that

you need to continually be doing release

it relax

smile come back sending loving and kind

to yourself appreciating yourself

feeling that I'm just not this story

keeps coming back

lost track thank you repeating so much

the point is here okay and you think

you've heard me say this a lot the thing

that's really amazing

is somebody will come in they'll do a

retreat and now hear me say the same

thing over and over and over and over

and then they'll come up and they'll say

you repeat yourself a lot don't shoot

and I said yes what did I say and

they'll go and then they say something

to the effect got it saved a few more

times before you get it yeah but what

happens is you'll hear me say it and

you'll practice it and as you practice

you get a little bit better and then one

day if I made that go and then you go oh

that's what he has been talking about

all this time you have a lot of Ohio

experiences as you let go of and the

hindrances like I said before are

absolutely essential to your progress in

the meditation so you say I have I don't

feel safe what does don't feel safe

really mean it means that I have

unpleasant feeling all right and I don't

like it and then I have this story that

says this feeling whenever it arises

it's it always lets me know that I feel

unsafe and that's your habitual tendency

always acting in that way now what I'm

saying is when that feeling arises

actually it's just a feeling it's only a

feeling it's not a good feeling it's not

a bad feeling it's only a feeling

sometimes if you

could be pleasant sometimes it can be

painful it doesn't matter same point

different sight as soon as that feeling

arises your mind grabs onto it and as

you begin to let go of that tightness in

your head you'll start to recognize that

much more quickly and more easily when

you let go of that tension and tightness

that comes up because of that feeling

there's no thoughts after that there's

no habitual tendency after that they

become weaker and weaker until finally

they will fade away and there is freedom

in them and this isn't a maybe this is a

real thing but it takes being persistent

it takes being observant of how Minds

attention keeps doing this over and over

again and one of the problems is that

our mind knows where all of our weak

spots are and it's gonna text you that

every every weeks about you now it's

gonna it's gonna attack there because

mine doesn't like having any discipline

it once it wants to what it wants to do

when it wants to do it

I had one monk do a retreat with me in

Malaysia

yeah I kept on asking him how he's doing

with his meditation and he said he kept

on grumbling and finally came to me one

day and he was all happy and he said I

just had a great meditation I thought

for four hours and I said aren't you

tired thinking that much that's really

gonna be able he didn't really realize

what he was doing when he was

identifying with all of his thoughts and

all of his feelings and he was trying to

intellectually solve his problem didn't

solve his problems at all but he thought

that that was great that he could think

that long and work it out in his mind

and what he was doing was being caught

by restlessness that's what the thinking

mind is all about restlessness comes up

in the same way as any other other

entrances first there is a feeling our

restlessness can be a pleasant feeling

or a painful feeling a pleasant feeling

you have a tendency

to start planning I'm gonna go see this

person and I'm gonna save this two of

them they're gonna see this back to me

and this is just gonna be great and then

you finally get to go see that person

and it doesn't even come close to what

you've spent all that time thinking

about see that's how sneaky your mind

that's how attached you can become to a

pleasant feeling and how do you get

attached to an unpleasant feeling I keep

trying to push it away to stop it I

don't want it to be there as you begin

to see more and more clearly how Minds

attention works and as you keep relaxing

and letting go what happens is your

whole life is is like on a wheel and

it's going counterclockwise and you

think that's the way things are supposed

to be

but when you start doing this you'll get

to a place where your mind stops and

that wheel stops turning

and then it'll start turning clockwise

just a little bit and you start seeing

things as they actually are but your old

habit is to think counter clockwise so

it starts going back counter clockwise

as you practice more let it stop and

it'll do it a little bit longer

eventually you start to see mind as it

truly is and you start paying more

attention to your heart and when you pay

attention to your heart you are able to

manifest things very very quickly but

you have to let go of the thinking the

thinking the thinking in the mind is

where all of our emotions are stored and

there is 52 different emotions okay and

they're all negative

why are they negative because they have

I am that attached to it

they're called unwholesome menses closes

I'm going to be there wanted to stay

want them to be the way I want them to

be and when they're not what happened

well we the pain that comes from that

kind of holding on kind of love the kind

of love I'm talking about is an

unconditional love the definition of

compassion is seeing another person in

pain allowing them the space to have

their own pain and loving them anyway

okay the kind of love you're talking

about is the kind that holds on and the

kind I'm talking about is unconditional

I'm gonna love you anyway it doesn't

matter what you do I'm gonna love you

see that the emotional love causes some

suffering

but the unconditioned love doesn't but

the more begin to teach yourself about

how my attention moves the easier it

gets

to recognize the different individual

parts of minds and when you start

recognizing that more easily your

meditation naturally starts flowing

deeper so when when you're practicing

the loving-kindness one of the enemies

of loving-kindness is attached love and

the way you have attached love is you

have somebody that you're really close

to and you start sending them loving

and then you start closing down around

them a little bit with your desire for

their well-being and then if their

well-being something happens they get

hit by a car they had some kind of an

accident you fall apart right there

because of that attachment so there are

some enemies of the loving-kindness

another enemy of the loving-kindness is

uncontrolled laughter that will

dissipate your energy so fast there's

five kinds of laughter there's the

little smile there's a smile showing

your teeth then there's a smile showing

your teeth and a little tiny trouble

then there's the smile that the the

sound coming out is very loud and you

start rocking back and forth and then

there's the smile where you start having

tears running down your face and you

start rolling around on the ground

people love that now in Asia anybody

that laughs loudly is called a mountain

person and that is not a compliment

you're a mountain boy when someone loud

laughs rather loudly in a monastery all

the monks give them a dirty look so they

won't continue on laughing like that but

monks laugh a lot some of the laughter

is very light chuckling some of its

learn how to breathe certain ways while

you're everybody knows that you're

you're laughing why you do that but loud

laughter is very much found on in the

monasteries so when you get caught up in

especially after you do a retreat and

you're somewhat successful and you get

caught up in your laughter and it's hard

to stop it just keeps rolling and

rolling and rolling a lot try sitting

right after that and watch what your

mind does and you'll see why that's an

enemy okay

you could have had a great experience

with your meditation retreat and then

you start laughing and then you try to

sit and it's like you didn't even take a

retreat it's it's that that strong

hindrance but the unconditioned

loving-kindness that's the one where and

I don't get me wrong I'm not saying it's

wrong not to be attached to your family

cuz you're going to be that's fine but

if you have the kind of love that has

more balance in it then it's gonna be

much easier to handle if and when there

is some kind of an accident or somebody

gets hurt or somebody has some kind of

emotional upset and when you start

practicing with this kind of love the

amount of heated discussions starts

going down and it becomes less and less

the attachment the identification with

that

the feeling when it comes up if

something happens that there's an

accident or whatever that attachment

causes the extreme amounts of suffering

and look at where your mind went like

that and how your mind kept thinking the

same thoughts over and over again

and how your mind every time you even

got a glimpse of thinking about him your

mind just took off and ran with it and

there was a lot of suffering the whole

point of the meditation is learning how

to recognize that quality of mind so you

can start letting it go anytime you have

any repeat thoughts that means that

there is an attachment there and the

attachment is always I have that

every time you let go of that tension

and tightness and relax and the smile

and come back to wishing happiness into

the situation whatever you're letting go

of that subtle I am that and as you do

that the rollercoaster of emotions that

happens the high highs and the lows

starts to balance out a little bit and

then it's just like being on the ocean

with not big waves on it and before a

long your mind will have true balance

when you have that kind of balance you

start seeing everything much more

clearly you start knowing the right

thing to do at the right time you don't

have mind pulling you down and causing

emergencies now you see a problem the

way it is and you go okay let's face

that one get it over with and it doesn't

have to have these highly emotional

periods to knock you off balance anymore

that's what the meditation does that's

what the meditation is for so you can be

more and more free from suffering

and the beauty of this meditation is

that you teach it to yourself once you

have the basic principles and start to

understand it you teach yourself to be

more balanced my job is not the teacher

my job is the guide it's like we're

going through the forest and I've been

through the forest a few times and

you've never been there and I'd let you

go in front and then you start going off

the track a little bit I'll say well

maybe it'd be better if you stayed right

here and follow this one so the my job

as the guide is to show you how to stay

out in the path so you can get through

the forest in the fastest way possible

and I'm showing you that because that's

from my direct experience that's what I

have the spent 30 years practicing I

have the experience and guidance and

with that said I don't want you to

believe anything I want you to try it if

if you start believing everything that I

say then you're giving me way too much

credit and way too much power and I

don't want power I don't want any power

isn't that when I first started

meditating I knew I could meditate in a

way that would cause me to have a lot of

power and I made the conscious decision

that I don't want any I know that I had

the ability to do some of the things

that some of the magic men and India do

but I'm not interested in that those are

part of games what I'm interested in is

developing more and more the ability to

see how my ins attention actually works

and start developing the skill of being

able to say it plainly enough that just

about anybody can understand

so what I have come across so far is

that there is one thing and it doesn't

matter what religion anybody is one

thing that everybody wants and they all

want to have a joy everybody wants to be

happy the more you smile the more you

laugh at how mine get serious the more

joy you will begin to experience the

more uplifted your mind it

and I will guarantee you I've had some

students come and tell me that this is

not funny and there's no way I'm going

to laugh at this this is really serious

and it's hard and that's one of the

things that makes me laugh because it is

it's the attachment that's hard they're

not liking the situation and wanting it

to be different than it is and wanting

it to change the way I want it to change

when I want it to change but the truth

is when you let go and start laughing

with how crazy your mind is for taking

off on this one you're not caught by

the more you can develop here smile the

more you can develop your sense of humor

about yourself

the faster your progress is with your

meditation and you don't notice as you

start to go deeper into your meditation

that your sense of humor starts changing

and you start laughing with things a lot

more and you hear somebody to say

something that's right you can't help

but laugh that's it it's amazing it

really is and that's one of the ways

that you know that you're progressing

with your meditation is by the change in

your sense of humor I have one friend

I've had him for more than 30 years I

loved the guy dearly it goes in the

desert retreat and that first thing he

wants to do is go home and do things the

way he always has done them I can't wait

to get back home and get back into the

the way I always do things and the first

thing he does is go to his computer and

people send him jokes all the time and

he has this coarse sense of humor that

he's not willing to let go

so what happens with this meditation

stuck he doesn't want to change from the

way he is and if you don't want to

change then you won't if you don't if

you want to keep having the same kind of

sufferings over and over again you can

do that that's up to you

I can't do anything about that but if

you want to change I'll show you the way

to change that is the least painful and

the least fearful and starts to be fun

the yahoo group that we're on there's an

awful lot of people that when they start

they're really serious and I keep on

encouraging you got a smile more you got

a laugh more it's more fun to have fun

things like that and before long you can

feel it coming through they're writing

they're starting to do that and they're

starting to go yeah this is right every

time you feel your mind serious about

anything I don't care what it is there

is an attachment to I that's my concept

and that's what I believe iiiiii when

you develop your sense of humor what

happens is that this is me this is who I

am

changes to it's only this and with that

change of perspective that is the road

to freedom freedom from suffering

I was shocked when I found out that if

you laugh at how your mind is acting

right now I mean I went through a

situation where I was angry at somebody

and I'm walking in and driving my heels

into the ground and I'm muttering about

that no-good so-and-so and then a

thought came up and it was he thinks

he's my boss and it made me laugh

because that was ridiculous and as soon

as I laughed I've looked at my mind and

my mind was gone

it's only this anger I don't have to be

angry that was a major insight when you

can start to giggle and laugh with how

serious your mind gets about what it

thinks is important and you laugh with

that and you see this hasn't mirrors

important as I thought it was oh let it

be now you're in the present moment now

you're ready for whatever else arises

without being distracted the thing is

when you're practicing and you have a

lot of thoughts about this or that

you're not in the present moment at all

and it starts to be like you're looking

through colored lenses over your glasses

and everything is colored a little bit

this way or a little bit that way and

you never really see the clarity of

things when you start developing your

sense of you

and your smiley all of the sudden those

colors come up and then you go wow

there's flowers here there's all these

colors that I never even know we're

around because I've always had this fog

but over my eyes because I was thinking

my feelings instead of experiencing the

present moment so the more we can be

aware of how my ins attention moves and

not judge whether it's good or bad just

allow that see it let it be relaxed

smile bring your smile back wish

yourself happiness wish somebody else

happiness as you become begin to do that

more and more you gain more and more

that's the word I was looking for you

become more and more content with with

what you're doing in the present moment

and I looked up contentment in the in

the dictionary what is what is

contentment so the more you can be

content with what's happening in the

present moment the more uplifted your

mind it the more uplifted your mind is

the more balance you have and with that

balance comes clarity and understanding

there's gonna be some times that your

mind is gonna take off and it's gonna

really run its number for awhile and

that's okay

but when you can remember there it goes

again let it go then you have that

balance again

it's um it's the whole game is play it

again you can't criticize yourself

you're gonna go for hours on end without

recognizing that that's what your mind

is doing when you get out into the real

world but as soon as you remember to

look oh I'm not smiling let's try it

smiling now let go of this stuff because

that's just more rubbish that was one of

my case read on the ninth day he was

great he was always calling it rubbish

mind because that's what it really is it

just a bunch of junk and then you say

well I have to plan my day I have to

think sometimes yeah okay

plan your day think about it one time

now you know what it's gonna be like if

you need to write it down write it down

you don't need to think about it again

do you not call your medication the

possum oh yes okay you have insight

every time you see how every time you

notice that it'll start to have little

aha moments and those are insights and

then they'll start to get bigger as you

go deeper into that well I thought you I

thought you had said that it wasn't the

possum because I took of a poss I told

you I don't look past enough it's not

the possum out of the way it's being

taught right now yes I was there that

kind of a person that has what they call

insight knowledge --is well he he just

he has focused on watching the breath

and then he I told you he dealt with me

we

with emotions instead of them and we

shouldn't come up a physical pain or an

emotion comes up that's strong enough to

draw your attention away from the breath

then you look at it and then you come

back to the breath and by bringing

awareness to it but you label it fear

anxiety worry whatever you label it and

I mean I did this for a while and it

felt effective if I would label it and

by labeling it I felt like I wasn't

running from it and just being with it

it was like oh okay I can be it and he

said that it just brings you just result

of doing the practice in that way he

said it it brings you absolute

fearlessness and an ability to be he's a

psychiatrist at the UW is a young

resident and he said and you can be with

whether it's deep grief or deep joy

you'll feel it a lot more you'll have

more compassion for yourself and for

others okay now let it go for right yeah

it works on a surface level I'm not

working with surface level I'm working

with how to get rid of this suffering

all the way yeah okay what he's saying

does work I had 20 years of that I do

understand it very well but there is no

relaxing in that there is no conscious

letting go of the tension and tight

your head and in your mind now I'm gonna

give you the instructions in the suta on

mindfulness of breathing now this is

from the sati putana suit this is a

favorite suit of people that are

teaching straight Vipassana and see if

these instructions match the

instructions revealed when you're

practicing what that teacher was saying

okay and this is called mindfulness of

breathing

I'm just get to the straight

instructions breathing in long he

understands I breathe in lung or

breathing out longhand er stands I

breathe out long

breathing in short he understands I

breathe in short or breathing out short

he understands I breathe out short did

you hear me say nostril nostril tip

upper lip or abdomen no because that's

not in the instructions it says you

understand when you take a long breath

you understand when you take a short

breath that's what it says

now it says he trains thus I shall

breathe in experiencing the whole body

he trains thus I shall breathe out

experiencing the whole body

that's not body of breath it doesn't say

to focus only on the breath it doesn't

say any of the standard kind of

instructions that you get with straight

Vipassana but here's the key here's the

key to the instructions it says

he trains thus I shall breathe in

tranquilizing the bodily formation he

trains thus I shall breathe out

tranquilizing the bodily formation

what's the bottling formation of every

body on the in-breath you relax on the

out-breath you relax

does that sound like the instructions

that you got and this is intentional

relaxing and that is a kind of

one-pointed understand those

instructions believe me and I understand

them and right after that thought of

noting noting noting then immediately

you go back to the breath where is the

relaxing so the end results of this are

not the same the end results of this at

first you will feel some relief I

understand that but you're not

understanding how Minds attention moves

from one thing to another

you're not understanding the basic

principle of the Buddha's teaching and

that is he spent 45 years showing us

that this is a process of minds

attention moving from one thing to

another and he spent 45 years showing us

that this works the same way every time

and as you see that working like that

it's much easier to let it go

I understand okay now what do you one of

the things that they don't tell you when

you're practicing straight through pasta

huh is that quite often in the sutas it

talks about practicing serenity practice

that's what I'm showing you and the

pasta at the same time it says that

they're yoked together they're not

separate practices when they're when

they're talking about the pasta they

mean one point in this watching the red

rope and they're saying that that's

yoked with they're saying that that kind

of a pasta knee does not have serenity

in it it has just insight and they call

that in the insight into seeing

everything as being impermanent

suffering and not self those are the

words that they use but what I'm showing

you the insights that you have are more

because you're actually seeing how mine

grabs onto things

and you'd never go so deep in your

practice with the one pointed

concentration that the hindrances

our suppressed

the hindrances are never suppressed when

you're practicing the way the Buddha's

teaching according to the instructions

right here

yeah the hindrances are very very

necessary because you say I have a

feeling of insecurity the feeling the

they're there all of the emotional

feelings that arise and they're seeing

that this is mean this is mine this is

Who I am

now when you see that when you see

insecurity and you start thinking about

that and being afraid of not having that

and whatever you're already into your

habitual tendency you're already into

the suffering and you're indulging in it

because you're not seeing that those

thoughts and those feelings are part of

an impersonal process

as you begin to see that you can be

pulled away from this for a period of

time you let it be and you smile and

come back to your object of meditation

that hindrance starts to lose that

strong I am that and now it's like this

I take you outside and I'll show you an

automobile now where is the is it the

wheels because of the door isn't the

steering wheel isn't the motor an

automobile is a concept that's made up

of a lot of little parts and they're put

together and we call it an automobile

there but it's actually just a concept

because in reality is just a small lot

of little parts every hindrance is the

concept

where is insecurity

what is insecurity it's made up of a lot

of different little parts and when you

start recognizing that it's just parts

and it's not me it's not mine that's not

who I am

then you start to examine how it arises

and the way you do that is by letting it

me and relaxing

every time you realize you're letting go

of tension and tightness but you're also

letting go a little bit of

identification does suppress when you

get to a certain your suppression isn't

isn't it it's the force of the one

pointed concentration allowing it to

lose it hit it at first there's no

suppression at all there's all kinds of

hindrances that arise and you watch that

but as you go deeper you'll get to a

certain place in your concentration

where you cannot even pull up a

hindrance your mind won't accept it

are you coming max approach that is

suppression because of the force of the

concentration no it's not good it's not

good at all because that's where your

identification with those thoughts and

feelings are stored it's not the same

thing that your your psychiatrist

stopped that your psychiatrist is

talking about I'm not teaching anything

even close to that I just wasn't clear

which version everything I am it's the

one pointed concentration that he's

showing you and he might not even he

might not even recognize that then he

sees it on a more superficial level

because you want the hindrances the

hindrances are necessary because that's

where your attachment is and you can't

let go of attachment until you see it

very clearly how that attachment arose

okay so as you start to see that these

different distractions that come

you start to see them as concepts

instead of this is my feeling this is

who I am and I'm gonna keep thinking

these thoughts okay as you start to see

oh these this is just part of a process

this is just part of this suffering and

this feeling of fear or feeling of

anxiety or whatever it happens to be

that's just the concept let's look at

how that whole process worked then it's

much easier to see and to let it go

depending how strong our attachment is

that's how much it will keep coming back

so if your attachment is fairly strong

and welcome to the real world we all be

on and that's fine but trying to see how

they arose instead of why or trying to

control by just saying your fear fear

fear fear fear that's not letting go of

that attachment that is a form of

control that doesn't lead to the

cessation of suffering

have you let go of your attachment it

has to be the understand suppression and

I and I I lost track of whether he was

saying the suppression was part of what

the psychiatrist had taught and it was a

bad a bad aspect of it or it was what we

were aiming at and I didn't think we

were aiming at suppressing the presence

suppression because of the force of the

concentration you don't even know what

that you're suppressing anything you

don't even know that you're stopping

anything but the force of the

concentration will stop some things from

coming up and when it does you will

think that your mind is very pure at

that time but when you lose that

concentration and you get up and you

walk outside and somebody does something

you don't like all of a sudden that

hindrance is there and it's big time it

really comes back strong what I'm

showing you is this is how the hindrance

works and it works the same whether

you're walking outside or whether you're

sitting here or whatever you're doing

the hindrance always works in the same

way and you'll be able to

knows that and see the pain you're

causing yourself and let that go

that's the beauty of the Buddha's path

is seeing that it's not only about

sitting in meditation it's about living

your life and having less and less

holding on and wanting to control and

all of these other kind of thing there's

a lot of them this is called a nakiya

which is nicaya means a group of his

courses and this is the middle length

saying that means what they're not real

short they're not real lofty better

building they are all there's an awful

lot of instruction and see the Buddha

was a master at being able to see how

his mind worked and then teach other

people how their minds work so that they

could let go of suffering

with masters over state well it's kind

of an understatement I mean he was he

was brilliant he was it's really

something and it doesn't have to do with

you have to believe anything they're

saying you don't have to believe

anything that he was saying as a matter

of fact he doesn't want you to believe

anything you want you to try it said in

there that the Buddha said don't don't

take my word for it

there's some crossover I had mentioned

those books do you like Pema Chodron

will I will that reading her will that

be confusing talking more about one

pointed concentration then she is

welcome to the real world almost

everybody does they could be very good

to read but add the step when you're

reading it in your mind when she said

well just let it go and go back add that

step let it go relax smile and go back

in Jon kabat-zinn

yeah I'm he does the same thing and he

does a lot of wonderful work but he is

working with one pointed concentration

and it's a different end result the way

reading happens right now it's awful lot

of people have an awful lot of views of

what they think the Buddha was talking

about and I'm the only one in this

country that I know of that reads

straight from the Citiz and I talk to

you about what the city says it's not

from me it's

so it's a little bit different than

you're going to be running across with

reading and if you spend time reading

it's going to become more and more

confusing I know of her I've read some

of her interviews I saw they have these

mp3 players that did their round ones

like this I can do CD or it's not ipod

mp3 the iPod is the mp3 files or putting

it on the iPod

to put this on his heart with so many

times I do repeat myself a lot that I go

well what you were and I was

paraphrasing a lot of it actually I was

trying to follow why he kept repeating

everything and it sounded every time he

got to the end of it that the person who

was speaking with her he was being

spoken about what wood was trying to

latch on to a different thing like

virtue and that didn't work out so well

it's a purpose it's a progression of the

way you

that's okay but the whole point of the

learning how to have balance all of the

time yeah the more you can practice the

easier it becomes just like with

anything I mean if you start to learn

how to play golf

it's hard to hit that little ball hey

first started he couldn't hit the ball

very well and you practice you get

better and better

well I'm very dedicated to doing this

listen to the Dhamma talks a lot more it

has to do with your level of

understanding starts to change and you

can listen to the same dog over and over

like I was saying and you start hearing

it on different levels and it always

seems like it's talking right directly

to you put all those talks on one CD

they put it on an mp3 format instead

okay if but if he puts it says iPod that

I have to listen to the same time what

you never get it uploaded on your

computer and then actually burn it under

CDs if you wanted to take see doesn't

David sell the CDs yeah he wanted to

order the

well I just was thinking about taking it

with me somewhere like if I let's do it

at home Luke puts it on his iPod if you

go to if you go to Walmart or you go to

Walgreens area they have these they're

round players in their CD players and

but they're also em so I could just put

this in it and listen to it they said if

anyone's be suffering free and the fear

structure of us being maybe bringing our

brief and Mail

may all beings share this merit and with

us acquired for the acquisition of all

kinds of adamant named beings inhabiting

space and earth they have a son Nagas

almighty power share this narrows and a

long protect the Buddhist dispensation

you

one of the interesting things that

happens with the discourses and the

middle banks things is they they might

have two discourses with the same name

but they'll say this one's the big one

and this one's the small one and the

small one is almost always bigger than

the big one don't ask me I have no idea

how that works

thus have I heard on one occasion the

blessed one was living in Swati in

jeta's grove anathapindika's park then

when a brahmin pinga lakota went to the

blessed one and exchanged greetings with

him when the courteous and amiable talk

was finished he sat down at one side and

said to the blessed one master Gautama

there are these refuses and brahmins

each the head of an order the head of a

group the teacher of a group a

well-known and famous founder of a sect

regarded by many as a saint it goes

through a bunch of names and I'm not

going to do that they have they have

they all had direct knowledge as they

claimed or none of them had direct

knowledge or have some of them had

direct knowledge and some not enough

Brahmin let this be have they all had

direct knowledge as they claimed or have

none of them had direct knowledge it or

have some of them had

direct knowledge and some not I shall

teach you the Dhamma Brahman listen and

attend closely to what I shall say

basically the Buddha wasn't interested

in gossip basically what this is saying

he wasn't interested in comparing other

people

well let's speculate whether this one

has it has this degree of enlightenment

or what so he always when he was asked

these kinds of questions he always says

I'm gonna teach you the Dhamma you

decide for this other stuff for yourself

because it doesn't really matter yes sir

the Brahmin replied the Blessed One said

this suppose Brahma Brahma a man meeting

heartwood seeking heartwood wandering in

search of heartwood came to a great tree

standing possessed of heartwood passing

over its heartwood its sapwood its inner

bark its outer bark he would cut off the

twigs and leaves and take them away

thinking that they were heartwood then a

man with good sight seeing him might say

this good man did not know the heartwood

the sapwood the inner bark the outer

bark were the twigs and leaves

thus while needing heartwood seeking

heartwood wandering in search of

heartwood he came to a great tree

standing possessed of heartwood passing

over the heartwood its sapwood its inner

bark it's outer bark he cut off the

twigs and leaves and took them away

thinking they were heartwood whatever it

was this good man had to make with

heartwood his purpose will not be served

suppose a man needing heartwood and

seeking heartwood wandering in search of

heartwood can

to a great tree standing possessed of

heartwood passing over the heartwood its

sapwood and its inner bark he would cut

off the outer bark and take it away

thinking it was heartwood and we keep

going on repeating over and over again

suppose a man made in heartwood passing

over heartwood and it SAP would he would

cut off the inner bark and take it away

thinking it was heartwood suppose a man

needing heartwood passing over its

heartwood he would cut off the SAP wood

and take it away thinking it was

heartwood suppose the man needing

heartwood seeking heartwood wandering in

search of heartwood came upon a great

tree standing possessed of heartwood

cutting off only its heartwood he would

take it away knowing that it was

heartwood then a man with good sight

seeing him might say this good man knew

the heartwood the sapwood the inner bark

the outer bark and twigs and leaves thus

while meeting heartwood seeking

heartwood wandering in search of

heartwood he came to a great tree

standing possessed of heartwood cutting

off only its heartwood he took it away

knowing it was heartwood whatever it was

this good man had to make with heartwood

his purpose will be served so to brahman

here's some clansmen goes forth out of

the out of faith from the home life into

the homeless considering I'm a victim of

birth aging and death of sorrow

lamentation pain grief and despair I'm a

victim of suffering a prey to suffering

surely an ending of this whole mass of

suffering can be known when he has gone

forth thus he acquires gain honour and

renown he is pleased with

honour and renown and his intention is

fulfilled on account of it he nods

himself in disparages others thus I have

gained honour and renown but these other

monks are unknown of no account so he

arouses no desire to act he makes no

effort for the realization of those

other states that are higher and more

sublime than gain honour and renown he

hangs back and slackens I say that this

person is like the man made in heartwood

who came to a great tree standing

possessed of heartwood and passing over

the heartwood and sapwood its inner bark

and outer bark cut off his twigs and

leaves and took it away thinking it was

heartwood and so whatever it was he had

to make with heartwood his purpose would

not be served here Brahman some clansmen

goes forth out of faith from the home

life into the homeless considering I am

a victim of Aging in depth of sorrow

lamentation pain grief in despair I'm a

victim of suffering afraid to suffering

surely an end of this whole mass of

suffering can be known when he has gone

forth

thus he acquires gain honour and renown

he is not pleased with being honour and

renown and

intention is not fulfilled he does not

on account of it laud himself and

disparage others he aroused this desire

to act and he makes an effort for the

realization of those other states that

are higher and more sublime than gain

honour and renown he does not hang back

in slacking he achieves the attainment

of virtue he is pleased with the

attainment of virtue and his intention

is fulfilled on a counter that he loves

himself and disparages others thus I am

virtuous of good character but those

other monks are immoral of evil

character so he arouses no desire to act

he makes no effort for the realization

of those other states that are higher

and more sublime and then the attainment

of virtue he hangs back and slackens I

say that this man is like the man

needing heartwood who passing over its

heartwood its sapwood and its inner bark

cut off the outer mark and took it away

thinking it was heartwood so whoever was

whatever it was he had to make with the

heartwood his purpose will not be served

here Brahmans son clansmen go forth out

of faith from the home life into the

homeless considering I'm a victim of

birth aging and death of sorrow

lamentation pain grief in despair I'm a

victim of suffering a prey to suffering

surely an ending of this whole mass of

suffering can be known when he has gone

forth thus he acquires gain honour and

renown he's not pleased with the

honor and rebound and his intention is

not fulfilled he achieves the attainment

of virtue he's pleased with the

attainment of virtue but his intention

is not fulfilled he does not on account

of it laud himself in disparage others

he arouses desire to act and he makes an

effort for the realization of those

other states that are higher and more

sublime than the attainment of virtue he

does not hang back and slacken he

achieves the attainment of this says

concentration but this kind of

concentration is the concentration you

need when you are reciting sutas so this

is not the same kind of concentration as

a meditation concentration it's what you

get with when you do your rope

memorizing over and over he's pleased

with the attainment of concentration and

his intention is fulfilled on account of

it he loves himself and disparages

others I'm concentrated my mind is

unified but these other monks are

unconcentrated with their minds astray

so he arouses no desire to act he makes

no effort for the realization of those

other states higher and more sublime

than the attainment of concentration he

hangs back in slackens I say that this

person is like a man needing Hartwood

who passing over its heartwood and it's

AK would cut off the inner bark and took

it away thinking it was heartwood so

whatever it was that he had to make with

heartwood his purpose will not be served

here Brahmin some clansmen goes forth

out of faith from the whole knife into

the homeless considering I'm a victim of

birth aging and death of sorrow

lamentation pain grief in despair I'm a

victim of suffering a prey to suffering

surely an ending of this one massive

suffering can be known when he has gone

forth thus he acquires being honour and

renown he's not pleased with gained

honor and rebound and his intention is

not fulfilled he achieves the attainment

of virtue he's pleased with the

attainment of virtue but his intention

is not fulfilled he achieves the

attainment of concentration he's pleased

with the attainment of concentration but

his intention is not fulfilled he does

not unaccounted it lauded himself and

disparage others he arouses desire to

act and he makes an effort for the

realization of those other states that

are higher and more sublime than the

attainment of concentration he does not

hang back in slacking he achieves

knowledge and vision what we're talking

about here is the deep understanding

that comes from listening to Dhamma

talks

you can get to the first order the

second stage of enlightenment by

listening and understanding what the

Dhamma talks are start showing you one

of the reasons that the Buddha was

continually saying listen and attend

closely because he was letting everybody

know that they had the potential to

deeply understand what he was talking

about and with that all doubt would

disappear belief that rites and rituals

would lead to deep states of

understanding that disappears and the

belief that there is a personal self

that will disappear you start seeing

everything as being in person so just by

listening to the dhamma talk so you can

get knowledge and vision you can see how

things work by listening very

attentively and

understanding how the process of minds

attention moving from one thing to

another actually does work just about

every retreat I wind up reading one

particular suit and it's a challenge to

read it but the reason that I read it is

because it's probably the most powerful

suta that I know of

it's really really very powerful and I

took out all of the dot-dot-dot and

there is a lot of repetition in it but

after listening to that the sitting that

you have right after that is generally

quite good because it really really do

deeply understand how everything works

if you can listen with that kind of a

mind that's very attentive even though

there's a lot of repetition in it it'll

start to sink in

and you can at that moment really

realize ah this is the way it works and

you can become enlightened that's why I

like that suit

okay here Brahmin son clansmen goes

forth out of faith from the home knife

into the homeless considering I'm a

victim of birth aging and death of

sorrow lamentation pain grief and

despair I'm a victim of suffering

mccraty to suffering surely an ending of

this whole mass of suffering can be

known when he's gone forth thus he

acquires being honour and renown he's

not pleased with being honour and renown

and his intention is not fulfilled he

achieves the attainment of virtue he's

pleased with the attainment of virtue

but his intention is not fulfilled he

achieves the attainment of concentration

he's pleased with the attainment of

concentration but his intention is not

fulfilled he achieves knowledge and

vision he's pleased with knowledge and

vision but his intention is not

fulfilled he does not on account of that

law himself and disparage others he

arouses desire to act and he makes an

effort for the realization of those

other states that are higher and more

sublime than knowledge and new and he

does not hang back and slacken but what

are the states that are higher and more

sublime than knowledge and vision here

Brahman quite secluded from show

pleasure saluted from unwholesome states

in terms of on in abides in the first

jhana which is accompany by thinking and

examining thought with joy and happiness

born of seclusion this is a state higher

and more sublime than

knowledge and vision that's the key that

tells you that it's not the

concentration for you and collected and

I'm not referring to meditation no but

there is understanding there is the

understanding of the process because an

honor to does it mentions that you when

you start out first your precepts

develop your virtue then start developed

well generosity version and then virtue

and then meditation and that's how they

brought their yes imagine that it's

consistent it'll be patient when you're

secluded from sensual pleasures that

mean you're not pulled to the central

pleasures that means while you're

sitting in meditation you close your

eyes the sensual pleasure of seeing as

you're being secluded from it if a sound

occurs your mind goes to that sound

you've let that sound be it doesn't

matter whether it's other people talking

or music or loved songs whatever happens

and car going by it doesn't matter you

allow that sound to be there but now you

don't pay attention to it and you relax

and you smile

come back to your meditation it happens

at all of the sense doors seeing hearing

tasting touching feeling and mind so

anytime you let go of the sensual

pleasures you're letting go of being

interested what that sensual pleasure is

and grabbing on to it and identifying

with it you're letting it be there by

itself now this is especially true with

thoughts thoughts are just thoughts

they're not your thoughts they're not my

thoughts they're just thoughts and we

have to treat them that way anytime you

start to get involved in the content of

the thought that leads directly to your

suffering so you have to be able to

recognize when your mind is distracted

and you might be distracted when you

first start out you might be distracted

for a period of time a few minutes and

that's okay but as soon as you remember

that's part of mindfulness as soon as

you remember that you're not on your

object of meditation then you let go of

the thoughts and let them be there by

themselves even if you're in

mid-sentence no matter how important it

seems that you should be involved in the

thinking just let it go

and smile and come back to the

loving-kindness and make another way for

your happiness

now sometimes you barely get a wish for

your happiness before your mind gets

distracted again that's fine when you

notice that let it be relaxed

it doesn't matter how active your mind

is or how much your mind wants to think

about this or that you're most

interested in seeing how Minds attention

from being on your object of meditation

if you get caught up in the thinking

about that means that you're grabbing on

to it and there is the desire to control

okay so you have to let go

our habitual tendency I mean I've been

living for 60 years now I've had some

real wacko habitual tendencies because

every time this kind of feeling came up

I always acted that way and it was like

it was like the such an automatic thing

that I wasn't even aware that I was

acting that way I thought that's the way

I was supposed to be but as you start

noticing that habitual tendency and

letting it be and relaxing coming back

to your object of meditation relaxing is

absolutely central to this practice you

can't say I can't say it often enough

you have to relax and the relaxing is

letting go of that tension and tightness

in your head when you let go of that

tension and tightness in your head you

let go of tension and tightness in your

mind when you let go of tension and

tightness in your mind you let go of

being clouded with your observation your

mind is pure your mind is bright your

mind is very very alert but there's no

thinking to stop you from seeing what's

happening in the present moment and you

bring them that mind back to your object

so this is a very necessary part that

you need to continually be doing release

it relax

smile come back sending loving and kind

to yourself appreciating yourself

feeling that I'm just not this story

keeps coming back

lost track thank you repeating so much

the point is here okay and you think

you've heard me say this a lot the thing

that's really amazing

is somebody will come in they'll do a

retreat and now hear me say the same

thing over and over and over and over

and then they'll come up and they'll say

you repeat yourself a lot don't shoot

and I said yes what did I say and

they'll go and then they say something

to the effect got it saved a few more

times before you get it yeah but what

happens is you'll hear me say it and

you'll practice it and as you practice

you get a little bit better and then one

day if I made that go and then you go oh

that's what he has been talking about

all this time you have a lot of Ohio

experiences as you let go of and the

hindrances like I said before are

absolutely essential to your progress in

the meditation so you say I have I don't

feel safe what does don't feel safe

really mean it means that I have

unpleasant feeling all right and I don't

like it and then I have this story that

says this feeling whenever it arises

it's it always lets me know that I feel

unsafe and that's your habitual tendency

always acting in that way now what I'm

saying is when that feeling arises

actually it's just a feeling it's only a

feeling it's not a good feeling it's not

a bad feeling it's only a feeling

sometimes if you

could be pleasant sometimes it can be

painful it doesn't matter same point

different sight as soon as that feeling

arises your mind grabs onto it and as

you begin to let go of that tightness in

your head you'll start to recognize that

much more quickly and more easily when

you let go of that tension and tightness

that comes up because of that feeling

there's no thoughts after that there's

no habitual tendency after that they

become weaker and weaker until finally

they will fade away and there is freedom

in them and this isn't a maybe this is a

real thing but it takes being persistent

it takes being observant of how Minds

attention keeps doing this over and over

again and one of the problems is that

our mind knows where all of our weak

spots are and it's gonna text you that

every every weeks about you now it's

gonna it's gonna attack there because

mine doesn't like having any discipline

it once it wants to what it wants to do

when it wants to do it

I had one monk do a retreat with me in

Malaysia

yeah I kept on asking him how he's doing

with his meditation and he said he kept

on grumbling and finally came to me one

day and he was all happy and he said I

just had a great meditation I thought

for four hours and I said aren't you

tired thinking that much that's really

gonna be able he didn't really realize

what he was doing when he was

identifying with all of his thoughts and

all of his feelings and he was trying to

intellectually solve his problem didn't

solve his problems at all but he thought

that that was great that he could think

that long and work it out in his mind

and what he was doing was being caught

by restlessness that's what the thinking

mind is all about restlessness comes up

in the same way as any other other

entrances first there is a feeling our

restlessness can be a pleasant feeling

or a painful feeling a pleasant feeling

you have a tendency

to start planning I'm gonna go see this

person and I'm gonna save this two of

them they're gonna see this back to me

and this is just gonna be great and then

you finally get to go see that person

and it doesn't even come close to what

you've spent all that time thinking

about see that's how sneaky your mind

that's how attached you can become to a

pleasant feeling and how do you get

attached to an unpleasant feeling I keep

trying to push it away to stop it I

don't want it to be there as you begin

to see more and more clearly how Minds

attention works and as you keep relaxing

and letting go what happens is your

whole life is is like on a wheel and

it's going counterclockwise and you

think that's the way things are supposed

to be

but when you start doing this you'll get

to a place where your mind stops and

that wheel stops turning

and then it'll start turning clockwise

just a little bit and you start seeing

things as they actually are but your old

habit is to think counter clockwise so

it starts going back counter clockwise

as you practice more let it stop and

it'll do it a little bit longer

eventually you start to see mind as it

truly is and you start paying more

attention to your heart and when you pay

attention to your heart you are able to

manifest things very very quickly but

you have to let go of the thinking the

thinking the thinking in the mind is

where all of our emotions are stored and

there is 52 different emotions okay and

they're all negative

why are they negative because they have

I am that attached to it

they're called unwholesome menses closes

I'm going to be there wanted to stay

want them to be the way I want them to

be and when they're not what happened

well we the pain that comes from that

kind of holding on kind of love the kind

of love I'm talking about is an

unconditional love the definition of

compassion is seeing another person in

pain allowing them the space to have

their own pain and loving them anyway

okay the kind of love you're talking

about is the kind that holds on and the

kind I'm talking about is unconditional

I'm gonna love you anyway it doesn't

matter what you do I'm gonna love you

see that the emotional love causes some

suffering

but the unconditioned love doesn't but

the more begin to teach yourself about

how my attention moves the easier it

gets

to recognize the different individual

parts of minds and when you start

recognizing that more easily your

meditation naturally starts flowing

deeper so when when you're practicing

the loving-kindness one of the enemies

of loving-kindness is attached love and

the way you have attached love is you

have somebody that you're really close

to and you start sending them loving

and then you start closing down around

them a little bit with your desire for

their well-being and then if their

well-being something happens they get

hit by a car they had some kind of an

accident you fall apart right there

because of that attachment so there are

some enemies of the loving-kindness

another enemy of the loving-kindness is

uncontrolled laughter that will

dissipate your energy so fast there's

five kinds of laughter there's the

little smile there's a smile showing

your teeth then there's a smile showing

your teeth and a little tiny trouble

then there's the smile that the the

sound coming out is very loud and you

start rocking back and forth and then

there's the smile where you start having

tears running down your face and you

start rolling around on the ground

people love that now in Asia anybody

that laughs loudly is called a mountain

person and that is not a compliment

you're a mountain boy when someone loud

laughs rather loudly in a monastery all

the monks give them a dirty look so they

won't continue on laughing like that but

monks laugh a lot some of the laughter

is very light chuckling some of its

learn how to breathe certain ways while

you're everybody knows that you're

you're laughing why you do that but loud

laughter is very much found on in the

monasteries so when you get caught up in

especially after you do a retreat and

you're somewhat successful and you get

caught up in your laughter and it's hard

to stop it just keeps rolling and

rolling and rolling a lot try sitting

right after that and watch what your

mind does and you'll see why that's an

enemy okay

you could have had a great experience

with your meditation retreat and then

you start laughing and then you try to

sit and it's like you didn't even take a

retreat it's it's that that strong

hindrance but the unconditioned

loving-kindness that's the one where and

I don't get me wrong I'm not saying it's

wrong not to be attached to your family

cuz you're going to be that's fine but

if you have the kind of love that has

more balance in it then it's gonna be

much easier to handle if and when there

is some kind of an accident or somebody

gets hurt or somebody has some kind of

emotional upset and when you start

practicing with this kind of love the

amount of heated discussions starts

going down and it becomes less and less

the attachment the identification with

that

the feeling when it comes up if

something happens that there's an

accident or whatever that attachment

causes the extreme amounts of suffering

and look at where your mind went like

that and how your mind kept thinking the

same thoughts over and over again

and how your mind every time you even

got a glimpse of thinking about him your

mind just took off and ran with it and

there was a lot of suffering the whole

point of the meditation is learning how

to recognize that quality of mind so you

can start letting it go anytime you have

any repeat thoughts that means that

there is an attachment there and the

attachment is always I have that

every time you let go of that tension

and tightness and relax and the smile

and come back to wishing happiness into

the situation whatever you're letting go

of that subtle I am that and as you do

that the rollercoaster of emotions that

happens the high highs and the lows

starts to balance out a little bit and

then it's just like being on the ocean

with not big waves on it and before a

long your mind will have true balance

when you have that kind of balance you

start seeing everything much more

clearly you start knowing the right

thing to do at the right time you don't

have mind pulling you down and causing

emergencies now you see a problem the

way it is and you go okay let's face

that one get it over with and it doesn't

have to have these highly emotional

periods to knock you off balance anymore

that's what the meditation does that's

what the meditation is for so you can be

more and more free from suffering

and the beauty of this meditation is

that you teach it to yourself once you

have the basic principles and start to

understand it you teach yourself to be

more balanced my job is not the teacher

my job is the guide it's like we're

going through the forest and I've been

through the forest a few times and

you've never been there and I'd let you

go in front and then you start going off

the track a little bit I'll say well

maybe it'd be better if you stayed right

here and follow this one so the my job

as the guide is to show you how to stay

out in the path so you can get through

the forest in the fastest way possible

and I'm showing you that because that's

from my direct experience that's what I

have the spent 30 years practicing I

have the experience and guidance and

with that said I don't want you to

believe anything I want you to try it if

if you start believing everything that I

say then you're giving me way too much

credit and way too much power and I

don't want power I don't want any power

isn't that when I first started

meditating I knew I could meditate in a

way that would cause me to have a lot of

power and I made the conscious decision

that I don't want any I know that I had

the ability to do some of the things

that some of the magic men and India do

but I'm not interested in that those are

part of games what I'm interested in is

developing more and more the ability to

see how my ins attention actually works

and start developing the skill of being

able to say it plainly enough that just

about anybody can understand

so what I have come across so far is

that there is one thing and it doesn't

matter what religion anybody is one

thing that everybody wants and they all

want to have a joy everybody wants to be

happy the more you smile the more you

laugh at how mine get serious the more

joy you will begin to experience the

more uplifted your mind it

and I will guarantee you I've had some

students come and tell me that this is

not funny and there's no way I'm going

to laugh at this this is really serious

and it's hard and that's one of the

things that makes me laugh because it is

it's the attachment that's hard they're

not liking the situation and wanting it

to be different than it is and wanting

it to change the way I want it to change

when I want it to change but the truth

is when you let go and start laughing

with how crazy your mind is for taking

off on this one you're not caught by

the more you can develop here smile the

more you can develop your sense of humor

about yourself

the faster your progress is with your

meditation and you don't notice as you

start to go deeper into your meditation

that your sense of humor starts changing

and you start laughing with things a lot

more and you hear somebody to say

something that's right you can't help

but laugh that's it it's amazing it

really is and that's one of the ways

that you know that you're progressing

with your meditation is by the change in

your sense of humor I have one friend

I've had him for more than 30 years I

loved the guy dearly it goes in the

desert retreat and that first thing he

wants to do is go home and do things the

way he always has done them I can't wait

to get back home and get back into the

the way I always do things and the first

thing he does is go to his computer and

people send him jokes all the time and

he has this coarse sense of humor that

he's not willing to let go

so what happens with this meditation

stuck he doesn't want to change from the

way he is and if you don't want to

change then you won't if you don't if

you want to keep having the same kind of

sufferings over and over again you can

do that that's up to you

I can't do anything about that but if

you want to change I'll show you the way

to change that is the least painful and

the least fearful and starts to be fun

the yahoo group that we're on there's an

awful lot of people that when they start

they're really serious and I keep on

encouraging you got a smile more you got

a laugh more it's more fun to have fun

things like that and before long you can

feel it coming through they're writing

they're starting to do that and they're

starting to go yeah this is right every

time you feel your mind serious about

anything I don't care what it is there

is an attachment to I that's my concept

and that's what I believe iiiiii when

you develop your sense of humor what

happens is that this is me this is who I

am

changes to it's only this and with that

change of perspective that is the road

to freedom freedom from suffering

I was shocked when I found out that if

you laugh at how your mind is acting

right now I mean I went through a

situation where I was angry at somebody

and I'm walking in and driving my heels

into the ground and I'm muttering about

that no-good so-and-so and then a

thought came up and it was he thinks

he's my boss and it made me laugh

because that was ridiculous and as soon

as I laughed I've looked at my mind and

my mind was gone

it's only this anger I don't have to be

angry that was a major insight when you

can start to giggle and laugh with how

serious your mind gets about what it

thinks is important and you laugh with

that and you see this hasn't mirrors

important as I thought it was oh let it

be now you're in the present moment now

you're ready for whatever else arises

without being distracted the thing is

when you're practicing and you have a

lot of thoughts about this or that

you're not in the present moment at all

and it starts to be like you're looking

through colored lenses over your glasses

and everything is colored a little bit

this way or a little bit that way and

you never really see the clarity of

things when you start developing your

sense of you

and your smiley all of the sudden those

colors come up and then you go wow

there's flowers here there's all these

colors that I never even know we're

around because I've always had this fog

but over my eyes because I was thinking

my feelings instead of experiencing the

present moment so the more we can be

aware of how my ins attention moves and

not judge whether it's good or bad just

allow that see it let it be relaxed

smile bring your smile back wish

yourself happiness wish somebody else

happiness as you become begin to do that

more and more you gain more and more

that's the word I was looking for you

become more and more content with with

what you're doing in the present moment

and I looked up contentment in the in

the dictionary what is what is

contentment so the more you can be

content with what's happening in the

present moment the more uplifted your

mind it the more uplifted your mind is

the more balance you have and with that

balance comes clarity and understanding

there's gonna be some times that your

mind is gonna take off and it's gonna

really run its number for awhile and

that's okay

but when you can remember there it goes

again let it go then you have that

balance again

it's um it's the whole game is play it

again you can't criticize yourself

you're gonna go for hours on end without

recognizing that that's what your mind

is doing when you get out into the real

world but as soon as you remember to

look oh I'm not smiling let's try it

smiling now let go of this stuff because

that's just more rubbish that was one of

my case read on the ninth day he was

great he was always calling it rubbish

mind because that's what it really is it

just a bunch of junk and then you say

well I have to plan my day I have to

think sometimes yeah okay

plan your day think about it one time

now you know what it's gonna be like if

you need to write it down write it down

you don't need to think about it again

do you not call your medication the

possum oh yes okay you have insight

every time you see how every time you

notice that it'll start to have little

aha moments and those are insights and

then they'll start to get bigger as you

go deeper into that well I thought you I

thought you had said that it wasn't the

possum because I took of a poss I told

you I don't look past enough it's not

the possum out of the way it's being

taught right now yes I was there that

kind of a person that has what they call

insight knowledge --is well he he just

he has focused on watching the breath

and then he I told you he dealt with me

we

with emotions instead of them and we

shouldn't come up a physical pain or an

emotion comes up that's strong enough to

draw your attention away from the breath

then you look at it and then you come

back to the breath and by bringing

awareness to it but you label it fear

anxiety worry whatever you label it and

I mean I did this for a while and it

felt effective if I would label it and

by labeling it I felt like I wasn't

running from it and just being with it

it was like oh okay I can be it and he

said that it just brings you just result

of doing the practice in that way he

said it it brings you absolute

fearlessness and an ability to be he's a

psychiatrist at the UW is a young

resident and he said and you can be with

whether it's deep grief or deep joy

you'll feel it a lot more you'll have

more compassion for yourself and for

others okay now let it go for right yeah

it works on a surface level I'm not

working with surface level I'm working

with how to get rid of this suffering

all the way yeah okay what he's saying

does work I had 20 years of that I do

understand it very well but there is no

relaxing in that there is no conscious

letting go of the tension and tight

your head and in your mind now I'm gonna

give you the instructions in the suta on

mindfulness of breathing now this is

from the sati putana suit this is a

favorite suit of people that are

teaching straight Vipassana and see if

these instructions match the

instructions revealed when you're

practicing what that teacher was saying

okay and this is called mindfulness of

breathing

I'm just get to the straight

instructions breathing in long he

understands I breathe in lung or

breathing out longhand er stands I

breathe out long

breathing in short he understands I

breathe in short or breathing out short

he understands I breathe out short did

you hear me say nostril nostril tip

upper lip or abdomen no because that's

not in the instructions it says you

understand when you take a long breath

you understand when you take a short

breath that's what it says

now it says he trains thus I shall

breathe in experiencing the whole body

he trains thus I shall breathe out

experiencing the whole body

that's not body of breath it doesn't say

to focus only on the breath it doesn't

say any of the standard kind of

instructions that you get with straight

Vipassana but here's the key here's the

key to the instructions it says

he trains thus I shall breathe in

tranquilizing the bodily formation he

trains thus I shall breathe out

tranquilizing the bodily formation

what's the bottling formation of every

body on the in-breath you relax on the

out-breath you relax

does that sound like the instructions

that you got and this is intentional

relaxing and that is a kind of

one-pointed understand those

instructions believe me and I understand

them and right after that thought of

noting noting noting then immediately

you go back to the breath where is the

relaxing so the end results of this are

not the same the end results of this at

first you will feel some relief I

understand that but you're not

understanding how Minds attention moves

from one thing to another

you're not understanding the basic

principle of the Buddha's teaching and

that is he spent 45 years showing us

that this is a process of minds

attention moving from one thing to

another and he spent 45 years showing us

that this works the same way every time

and as you see that working like that

it's much easier to let it go

I understand okay now what do you one of

the things that they don't tell you when

you're practicing straight through pasta

huh is that quite often in the sutas it

talks about practicing serenity practice

that's what I'm showing you and the

pasta at the same time it says that

they're yoked together they're not

separate practices when they're when

they're talking about the pasta they

mean one point in this watching the red

rope and they're saying that that's

yoked with they're saying that that kind

of a pasta knee does not have serenity

in it it has just insight and they call

that in the insight into seeing

everything as being impermanent

suffering and not self those are the

words that they use but what I'm showing

you the insights that you have are more

because you're actually seeing how mine

grabs onto things

and you'd never go so deep in your

practice with the one pointed

concentration that the hindrances

our suppressed

the hindrances are never suppressed when

you're practicing the way the Buddha's

teaching according to the instructions

right here

yeah the hindrances are very very

necessary because you say I have a

feeling of insecurity the feeling the

they're there all of the emotional

feelings that arise and they're seeing

that this is mean this is mine this is

Who I am

now when you see that when you see

insecurity and you start thinking about

that and being afraid of not having that

and whatever you're already into your

habitual tendency you're already into

the suffering and you're indulging in it

because you're not seeing that those

thoughts and those feelings are part of

an impersonal process

as you begin to see that you can be

pulled away from this for a period of

time you let it be and you smile and

come back to your object of meditation

that hindrance starts to lose that

strong I am that and now it's like this

I take you outside and I'll show you an

automobile now where is the is it the

wheels because of the door isn't the

steering wheel isn't the motor an

automobile is a concept that's made up

of a lot of little parts and they're put

together and we call it an automobile

there but it's actually just a concept

because in reality is just a small lot

of little parts every hindrance is the

concept

where is insecurity

what is insecurity it's made up of a lot

of different little parts and when you

start recognizing that it's just parts

and it's not me it's not mine that's not

who I am

then you start to examine how it arises

and the way you do that is by letting it

me and relaxing

every time you realize you're letting go

of tension and tightness but you're also

letting go a little bit of

identification does suppress when you

get to a certain your suppression isn't

isn't it it's the force of the one

pointed concentration allowing it to

lose it hit it at first there's no

suppression at all there's all kinds of

hindrances that arise and you watch that

but as you go deeper you'll get to a

certain place in your concentration

where you cannot even pull up a

hindrance your mind won't accept it

are you coming max approach that is

suppression because of the force of the

concentration no it's not good it's not

good at all because that's where your

identification with those thoughts and

feelings are stored it's not the same

thing that your your psychiatrist

stopped that your psychiatrist is

talking about I'm not teaching anything

even close to that I just wasn't clear

which version everything I am it's the

one pointed concentration that he's

showing you and he might not even he

might not even recognize that then he

sees it on a more superficial level

because you want the hindrances the

hindrances are necessary because that's

where your attachment is and you can't

let go of attachment until you see it

very clearly how that attachment arose

okay so as you start to see that these

different distractions that come

you start to see them as concepts

instead of this is my feeling this is

who I am and I'm gonna keep thinking

these thoughts okay as you start to see

oh these this is just part of a process

this is just part of this suffering and

this feeling of fear or feeling of

anxiety or whatever it happens to be

that's just the concept let's look at

how that whole process worked then it's

much easier to see and to let it go

depending how strong our attachment is

that's how much it will keep coming back

so if your attachment is fairly strong

and welcome to the real world we all be

on and that's fine but trying to see how

they arose instead of why or trying to

control by just saying your fear fear

fear fear fear that's not letting go of

that attachment that is a form of

control that doesn't lead to the

cessation of suffering

have you let go of your attachment it

has to be the understand suppression and

I and I I lost track of whether he was

saying the suppression was part of what

the psychiatrist had taught and it was a

bad a bad aspect of it or it was what we

were aiming at and I didn't think we

were aiming at suppressing the presence

suppression because of the force of the

concentration you don't even know what

that you're suppressing anything you

don't even know that you're stopping

anything but the force of the

concentration will stop some things from

coming up and when it does you will

think that your mind is very pure at

that time but when you lose that

concentration and you get up and you

walk outside and somebody does something

you don't like all of a sudden that

hindrance is there and it's big time it

really comes back strong what I'm

showing you is this is how the hindrance

works and it works the same whether

you're walking outside or whether you're

sitting here or whatever you're doing

the hindrance always works in the same

way and you'll be able to

knows that and see the pain you're

causing yourself and let that go

that's the beauty of the Buddha's path

is seeing that it's not only about

sitting in meditation it's about living

your life and having less and less

holding on and wanting to control and

all of these other kind of thing there's

a lot of them this is called a nakiya

which is nicaya means a group of his

courses and this is the middle length

saying that means what they're not real

short they're not real lofty better

building they are all there's an awful

lot of instruction and see the Buddha

was a master at being able to see how

his mind worked and then teach other

people how their minds work so that they

could let go of suffering

with masters over state well it's kind

of an understatement I mean he was he

was brilliant he was it's really

something and it doesn't have to do with

you have to believe anything they're

saying you don't have to believe

anything that he was saying as a matter

of fact he doesn't want you to believe

anything you want you to try it said in

there that the Buddha said don't don't

take my word for it

there's some crossover I had mentioned

those books do you like Pema Chodron

will I will that reading her will that

be confusing talking more about one

pointed concentration then she is

welcome to the real world almost

everybody does they could be very good

to read but add the step when you're

reading it in your mind when she said

well just let it go and go back add that

step let it go relax smile and go back

in Jon kabat-zinn

yeah I'm he does the same thing and he

does a lot of wonderful work but he is

working with one pointed concentration

and it's a different end result the way

reading happens right now it's awful lot

of people have an awful lot of views of

what they think the Buddha was talking

about and I'm the only one in this

country that I know of that reads

straight from the Citiz and I talk to

you about what the city says it's not

from me it's

so it's a little bit different than

you're going to be running across with

reading and if you spend time reading

it's going to become more and more

confusing I know of her I've read some

of her interviews I saw they have these

mp3 players that did their round ones

like this I can do CD or it's not ipod

mp3 the iPod is the mp3 files or putting

it on the iPod

to put this on his heart with so many

times I do repeat myself a lot that I go

well what you were and I was

paraphrasing a lot of it actually I was

trying to follow why he kept repeating

everything and it sounded every time he

got to the end of it that the person who

was speaking with her he was being

spoken about what wood was trying to

latch on to a different thing like

virtue and that didn't work out so well

it's a purpose it's a progression of the

way you

that's okay but the whole point of the

learning how to have balance all of the

time yeah the more you can practice the

easier it becomes just like with

anything I mean if you start to learn

how to play golf

it's hard to hit that little ball hey

first started he couldn't hit the ball

very well and you practice you get

better and better

well I'm very dedicated to doing this

listen to the Dhamma talks a lot more it

has to do with your level of

understanding starts to change and you

can listen to the same dog over and over

like I was saying and you start hearing

it on different levels and it always

seems like it's talking right directly

to you put all those talks on one CD

they put it on an mp3 format instead

okay if but if he puts it says iPod that

I have to listen to the same time what

you never get it uploaded on your

computer and then actually burn it under

CDs if you wanted to take see doesn't

David sell the CDs yeah he wanted to

order the

well I just was thinking about taking it

with me somewhere like if I let's do it

at home Luke puts it on his iPod if you

go to if you go to Walmart or you go to

Walgreens area they have these they're

round players in their CD players and

but they're also em so I could just put

this in it and listen to it they said if

anyone's be suffering free and the fear

structure of us being maybe bringing our

brief and Mail

may all beings share this merit and with

us acquired for the acquisition of all

kinds of adamant named beings inhabiting

space and earth they have a son Nagas

almighty power share this narrows and a

long protect the Buddhist dispensation

you