From: https://youtube.com/watch?v=WuP1tUZYPaY
Context: Throughout this transcript, Bhante Vimalaramsi is the speaker unless otherwise indicated.
one of the important questions that
never really gets answered when you go
to monk's that are teaching meditation
is I asked them very directly what is
craving and I got a bunch of assorted
answers and then it was like oh its
desire and things like that but I asked
them a follow-up question how do you
recognize when craving arises what are
you supposed to do with craving when it
arises how do you let go of craving this
is very important questions and it's a
necessary thing to really understand
that craving is the source of suffering
so
when you're sitting and meditation and
your mind gets distracted you'll notice
that there's a kind of tension or
tightness that happens in your head
around your brain there's a membrane
goes around your brain and I forgot the
whole trip I've been without my little
brain which drives me crazy anyway that
membrane is called the meninges and that
tension and tightness is how you
recognize that craving is present in
your mind there was some paperwork there
on the on the seat I don't know if
anybody picked any of that up that
should yeah yeah
craving always arises as tension and
tightness in your mind and in your body
and the way to let go of the craving is
by recognizing that there is tension and
tightness in your head and relax now a
lot of people when they practice
meditation they get caught up in
thinking and analyzing and trying to
control the thoughts and that is not how
you let go of craving
and there's there should be some little
yeah those have to be soon out and about
and in the afternoon and in the evening
now this being able to recognize craving
is an important part of this meditation
and this little piece of paper that you
have here it taught it's something you
can carry with you to remind you what
this process is this little piece of
paper is Right effort it's part of the
Eightfold Path i just added a couple
extra things and turn them all into ours
so it's easy to talk about i call it the
six ours the way you practice the six
artists is by recognizing that your mind
is distracted your mind is pulled away
from your object to meditation and i'll
talk about the object of meditation and
the bit then you let that distraction be
you don't get involved in the story
about the distraction you simply let go
of that distraction it doesn't matter
what it is it doesn't matter if it's
anger or dissatisfaction or just
thinking ho-hum thoughts whatever it is
you let go of that craving or you let go
of that distraction and you let go of
the distraction by not keeping your
attention on it if you keep your
attention on the distraction you're
feeding the distraction and it will last
longer and cause a lot of suffering
so you don't keep your attention on the
distraction I don't care what the
distraction is anything that pulls her
attention to it let it be don't get
involved with the story of it now you'll
notice that there's a tension and
tightness in your head in your brain and
you relax now that's the first part of
the six hours you recognize when your
mind is distracted you release the
distraction and you relax the next part
of the six ours is Yuri smile now this
meditation is a smiling meditation and
smiling although it doesn't seem like
it's very important is very important
because the more you smile while you're
doing your meditation the easier
mindfulness becomes what is mindfulness
mindfulness is remembering to observe
how minds attention moves from one thing
to another that's all mindfulness is so
you remember to observe that your mind
is distracted you let go of the
distraction don't keep your attention on
it even if you're in mid-sentence in
your mind just let it be don't pay
attention to it relax that tightness in
your head now you want to put a smile on
your lips a smile in your eyes a smile
in your mind and the smile in your heart
now you come back to your object of
meditation for this retreat for most of
you I want you to be practicing
loving-kindness meditation and I'll
explain more in just a moment but you
come back to the loving-kindness and
stay with the loving-kindness for as
long as you can it doesn't matter how
many times your mind gets distracted it
doesn't matter what the distraction is
you let it be you relax you smile you
come back to your object to meditation
and stay with your object to meditation
for as long as you can most people that
have practiced meditation before with
other people they hear that you have to
put in more energy and more effort and
actually you have to stop putting so
much energy and effort into doing this
if the thought doesn't go away it
doesn't matter if the tightness doesn't
go away never mind you just do it one
time smile come back to your object of
meditation if it's still there your mind
will go back to it then you do the same
thing again now some people when i was
in indonesia they were trying to use the
six RS on everything that arose in their
mind and you don't have to six are
everything that arises in your mind only
if it pulls your attention to it there
can be some background chitter-chatter
don't pay attention to it if it doesn't
pull your attention away don't six art
just stay with your object of meditation
eventually that will
fade away by itself one of the things
that the Buddha said was your attention
is nutriment their words if you keep
your attention on that distracting
thought you're feeding it and when you
feed it it gets bigger and stronger so
when you let go of it and don't keep
your attention on it you start to starve
that and eventually your mind will start
to settle down if you start your
meditation and your mind gets distracted
20 or 30 times in a sitting and you use
the six hours and practice that and come
back to your object to meditation that
is not a bad meditation it's an active
meditation but it's not a bad meditation
every time you let go of a distraction
and relax and smile and come back to
your object to meditation it improves
your mindfulness so you're able to
observe more quickly over a period of
time when your mind starts to get
distracted so I know that there's a lot
of meditation teachers that tell you
don't think and that's not an easy thing
and it takes many years to develop that
kind of practice but the Buddha said
that when you're on the path and you're
practicing Dhamma which is the teaching
of the Buddha that it is immediately
effective every time you let that
thought be
and relax and come back to your object
to meditation after smiling then you'll
notice that you don't have any thoughts
in your mind at that time your mind is
clear your mind is bright your mind is
very alert that is a pure mind why is it
pure because you have let go of the
craving so you bring this pure mind back
to your smile back to your object to
meditation and that means that this is
immediately effective because you have
let go of the craving when you're
practicing loving-kindness meditation
you first start by sending loving and
kind thoughts to yourself now if you've
already been practicing this for a while
this is not for you this is for people
that haven't haven't done this before
you think of a time when you were happy
when you held a little baby in your arms
or an animal or whatever it happened to
be and you felt that warm heart
connection with that being that is the
feeling of loving kindness so you bring
up that feeling and then you make a wish
for your own happiness you know what I
feels like to be happy you know what it
feels like to be peaceful and calm you
know what it feels like to be joyful
whatever wish you make for yourself you
need to feel that wish
and then take that wish and put it in
your heart and surround yourself with
that feeling and radiate that feeling to
yourself again it doesn't matter how
many times your mind gets distracted
every time your mind gets pulled away
it's not a bad thing it's just what's
happening in the present moment and it's
okay it has to be okay because that's
the truth when your mind is distracted
you have a distraction you don't need to
fight with the distraction you don't
need to try to make the distraction stop
putting in too much energy and that
causes a distraction to last longer so
all you do is simply use the six ours
you recognize your mind is distracted
you let the distraction be you relax the
tightness caused by that distraction re
smile come back to your object to
meditation stay with your object of
meditation as long as you can so the
first ten minutes of every sitting
please send loving and kind thoughts to
yourself after 10 minutes then you start
sending loving and kind thoughts to a
spiritual friend a spiritual friend is
someone of the same sex and they are
alive okay
so you need to stay with the same
spiritual friend until I tell you to
change so it's a person of the same sex
and they are alive a spiritual friend is
someone with that when you think of them
and their good qualities you really like
that person you sincerely do wish them
well so you stay with that spiritual
friend all the way through the city you
sit no less than 30 minutes to start off
with when you're sitting you want to sit
with your back nice legs straight not
leaning heavily into the chair but
nicely straight and don't move don't
wiggle your toes don't wiggle your
fingers don't scratch don't rub don't
change your posture don't rock back and
forth this is something that I've run
across lately if you want to see someone
that sits like that very well he does
you can move as much as he does so when
you're sitting in meditation you sit
very very still while you're sitting
like this there can be some sensations
that arise in your body you feel a
little stiff and feel some heat arising
you can feel an itch or want to cough
whatever it happens to be when that
pulls your attention to it then you use
the six ours you recognize that your
minds not on your object of meditation
you let it be by itself you relax Yuri
smile you come back to your object to
meditation your spiritual friend
and you stay with the same spiritual
friend all the time then you get up and
it's time to do some walking you stay
with the spiritual friend while you're
walking and wish them well when you're
doing your walking you don't walk slowly
you walk at a normal pace and your mind
isn't going to be used to it at first
and the walking as somewhat difficult
because you're used to walking around
thinking about this thinking about that
not paying attention to what you're
doing okay as soon as you notice that
then you six are and come back to your
spiritual friend you might stay with
them for three or four seconds before
your mind gets distracted again okay do
it again the six ours are the most
important part of this practice they
will carry you through to nibhana I
promise so anything that distracts your
mind that you want to let it be relax
smile come back to your spiritual friend
walk no less than 15 minutes if you're
walking is good walk longer when you're
walking keep your eyes down if you're
looking around at this or that and I
know there's a lot of stuff to look at
around here then that's where your mind
goes and all of a sudden you're thinking
about this or that so you have to six
are so keep your eyes nicely comfortably
down six or eight feet in front of you
while you're sitting if some kind of a
disturbance happens in your body you get
a pain in your knee you get an itch
someplace you feel like you need to
cough the first thing you need to do is
let it be don't keep your attention on
it and
now the nature of these kind of
sensations is they don't go away right
away so it's going to come back it's
going to be like it doesn't disappear it
just keeps on coming doesn't matter
every time you notice your attention has
gotten pulled to it then you let it be
and relax and smile and come back to
your object to meditation eventually one
of two things will happen either that
sensation will go away or it won't it
doesn't matter either way if it goes
away then it's easier to stay with your
object of meditation if it doesn't go
away your mind will start to get into a
sense of balance and it doesn't even
pull your attention to it anymore now
when you're sitting the sensation that
arises is there that's the truth any
time you try to fight with the truth any
time you try to control the truth any
time you try to make the truth be the
way you want it to be that is a cause of
suffering so you want to just allow that
sensation to be there without reacting
to it like you always act when an itch
comes up you always scratch it right
well now you just let it be it's not so
important
so sit comfortably if you are sitting
and you have a pain that arises and you
sit with it for a little while and it
doesn't go away and you know that you're
hurting your body in one way or another
and you know that by when you get up and
start to walk the pain doesn't go away
don't sit like that anymore we don't
want you to hurt yourself there is
something called a meditation pain and
that meditation pain when it arises and
is there and it can be real intense for
a period of time and then you get up and
start walking within five or ten seconds
it goes away that pain goes away that
means it's a meditation pain so if you
have a meditation pain and you start
recognizing that as a meditation pain
then just six are and let it be and
relax when your meditation is good sit
longer as long as you're comfortable but
if a meditation pain comes up that means
you have to roll up your sleeves a
little bit now it's time to go to work
and use your six hours look at how
tricky your mind becomes you'll start
thinking about boy I hate this feeling
when it comes up i really want to
scratch that itch every thought about
that sensation makes the sensation
bigger and more intense so the first
thing you want to do is notice that
you're thinking let go of the thinking
and relax
now you'll notice there's a tight mental
fist wrapped around that sensation that
tight mental fist is a version they
don't like that feeling don't want it
there so you allow it to be there and
you relax and let it be by itself smile
and come back to your object to
meditation your mind goes back to it
again you start having thoughts about it
again let go of the thoughts relax let
goals that tight mental fist Rep Tyrone
that and relax smile come back to your
object to meditation this is a process
of do it again okay always come back to
the six hours with anything that
distracts your mind any kind of movement
any kind of vibration any kind of
thought anything that pulls your
attention away is a distraction take
interest in sending your spiritual
friend kind and loving thoughts the more
interested you are in sincerely wishing
your friend well the easier it is to
stay with that friend when you start to
feel a little bit of sleepiness arise
this is called sloth and torpor the
reason that it arises is because you've
been with your spiritual friend for a
while and your mind starts thinking
these little tiny thoughts bite itself
and before long you start to get dreamy
and before long your posture start
slumping and before long you start
nodding and when you get
when you notice that quite often you
forget to use the six ours and you sit
up real straight I'm not going to let
that happen again and it happens again
the more interest you take in how that
arose the easier it is to let go of that
sleepiness all distractions happen in
exactly the same way a feeling arises
now feeling is not emotion feeling is
either a pleasant feeling or painful
feeling right after that feeling arises
there's tension and tightness that
happens in your head in your mind that
is craving right after that arises then
all of your thoughts all of your
opinions all of your ideas all of your
concepts all of your story about why you
like or dislike that feeling arises
right after that you get into your
habitual tendency of every time this
kind of thing arises I always do that
now this is where the emotional
attachment is stored and right after
that you have a birth of action and
sorrow lamentation pain grief and
despair and other words suffering arises
and you're taking that suffering
personally this is me this is mine this
is who I am this is my thoughts these
are my feelings that means that craving
is present in your mind at that time
you use the six ours you recognize when
your mind is distracted you release the
distraction you relax now you've let go
of that craving even if it's for a brief
moment you've let it go smile come back
to your object to meditation continue
with it as long as you can sometimes
it's only half of a wish for your
happiness before your mind gets
distracted again doesn't matter this is
a practice of patience
it's there yes it's real yes I don't
like it true but it's not yours you
didn't sit there and say well you know I
haven't had an itch for a long time it's
time to get some itches it arises
because the conditions are right for it
to arrive what you do with what arises
in the present moment dictates what
happens in the future now every
hindrance that arises has I am that
attached to it the hindrances are
exceptionally important hindrances are
not your enemy to fight with they're
just simply a distraction that pulls
your attention away you use the six
hours and you come back you don't need
to note it until it goes away thinking
thinking thinking thinking thinking and
then come back to your object of
meditation you don't need to note it all
you have to do is recognize that your
mind is distracted let the distraction
be there by itself don't keep your
attention on it don't feed the
distraction relax smile come back to
your object of meditation stay with your
object of meditation as long as you can
it's real simple now you can be sitting
in meditation and you're staying with
your object of meditation very nicely
and there's a distraction every now and
then that's fine you six are it and let
it be in
come back and then it's time to get up
and do your walking meditation you stay
with your spiritual friend while you're
getting up while you're going outside
while you're doing your walking and then
you come back and sit some more always
coming back to yourself for the first
ten minutes sending loving and kind
thoughts to yourself feel the wish that
you make for yourself i just gave you
some examples of a wish there are
sometimes people will come and get in
touch with me and they say i have a
friend that's really going through a
rough time right now and they're
thinking all the time can you help them
so i can give it a try so I start
sending loving and kind thoughts to that
person and the wish that I make for that
person is having an open accepting mind
but I have to feel that wish and put
that wish in my heart and surround that
person in my heart with this feeling of
having an open accepting mind and after
I do that for a little while I get in
touch with this person say well how are
they doing now oh they're much better
now meditation is not just sitting
meditation is life all different aspects
of your life you can use the six ours no
matter what you're doing with your daily
activities did you give them jobs to do
okay when you're doing whatever task she
is giving you that's the time to
practice your six hours I don't feel
like washing these dishes who doesn't
to who doesn't like it who wants it to
be different than it is you get caught
in those thoughts and those feelings now
you you're not practicing than six hours
you're not doing the meditation you have
to let go of your opinions and your
ideas and your thoughts about because
that's what the Buddha called clinging
and that leads to your emotional
reaction to it and that leads to me
putting in too much energy into much
effort and now you really get caught in
a cycle my mind is so active I can't do
anything with it it just keeps on going
and going and going okay fine stop
trying so hard you don't have to control
anything let it be there and relax and
smile and wish happiness to a friend
feel that feeling of your wish
the thing with a hindrance is that's
where you store your attachments and
attachments are always I am that so
every time you use the six hours you're
letting go of the attachment a little
bit at a time it's like putting a coin
in the bank putting it in a piggy bank
over a period of time you'll fill it up
but it takes a while and it takes some
work it's kind of funny people come to
me for the interview which I give every
day and they'll say I had a great
meditation my mind was so calm I could
stay with the object of meditation and I
kind of gone and go okay fine continue
everything's going fine but when you
come in and you start complaining about
your mind doing this or doing that ah
good meditation isn't it why is it good
because now you have to work now you're
really doing the meditation now you're
allowing this to be and relaxing and
smiling and coming back and whoops there
it goes again it doesn't matter how many
times your mind is distracted sometimes
there is an attachment that's real big
and real strong and it doesn't go away
very quickly great it's helping you to
improve your mindfulness how did your
mind go from being on your object of
meditation over to this distraction how
did it happen we don't care about why
that's for the psychologists they can
work with that only one we're trying to
see how this process of mine arising
actually
works what happens first what happens
right after that what happens after that
what happens after that the more you use
the six ours the faster your progress
and the meditation becomes promise and
I'm used to people progressing very
quickly now the thing with this
meditation is I don't want you to
experiment with well I learned this on
that retreat maybe I'll throw some of
this in now don't do that I've given you
a perfect recipe you start throwing
other things in it that recipe isn't
going to come out in the same way so you
need to just follow the directions that
I've given you as closely as you can
without adding anything without
subtracting anything using the six ours
often is the key now some of you are
practicing mindfulness of breathing and
because you've done this in the past and
you've been practicing with one pointed
concentration it's very easy to forget
about the relax step can't do that you
have to continue on the in breath relax
tension and tightness in your head in
your mind on the out-breath you relax
the tension and tightness in your head
in your mind on the in breath relax on
the out breath relax there's a
distraction let it be relax smile bring
that smiling pure mind back to your
object of meditation on the in breath
relax on the out breath relax
if you forget the relaxed step you are
going to tend towards one pointed
concentration and that means that the
end result of the retreat will not be
what you're really looking for the
relaxed step is by far the most
important part of the cigs ours and the
more you can use the six ours and
develop the habit of using the six hours
after a period of time it will start to
become automatic something starts to
arise in your mind and it'll just fade
away by itself so you stay with your
object omitted to keep using the relaxed
step now if you're doing mindfulness of
breathing you want to continue that
while you are walking keep your eyes
down don't let other things distract you
and I know the wind can be distracting
so it's just the wind so what doesn't
matter and I know that sometimes it gets
cold here well okay it gets cold so what
it's only a feeling I don't like being
cold who doesn't like it who has an
attachment in their mind at that time
this practice is much easier than most
people realize it's simple
all you have to do is every time your
mind goes anywhere I don't care what it
is I don't care how interesting it is
need to six are simply smile come back
to your object to meditation I want you
to smile from the time you get up in the
morning until you go to bed at night I
had some people they said well I don't I
don't want to meditate they're thinking
that meditation is just about sitting I
can't sit still okay don't smile all the
time and when you see you're not use the
six ours and start again now there's
three parts to meditation the first part
of meditation is practicing your
generosity how do you practice
generosity when you're in a retreat when
you are sending loving and kind thoughts
to your spiritual friend you are sending
that loving kind feeling to them you're
giving them your attention and you're
giving him the good feeling that you
have in your heart and wishing them
sincerely to be happy so you're
practicing your generosity track
practice your generosity with your
actions practice generosity with your
speech say things that make other people
smile although I don't want you talking
on this retreat and think kind loving
thoughts to your spiritual friend so
you're practicing generosity when you
are doing this
practice that softens your mind that
makes it easier to smile all the time
and I've had students that got to
exceptionally deep states of meditation
and I told them that they had to smile
and they came back with Wonder on their
face going it really does help so I
don't care what level of meditation
you're at smile the more you smile the
easier it is to notice how your minds
attention moves from one thing to
another and the faster you'll catch that
and you will start to get progress in
your meditation if you sit and have a
good sitting and then you get up and you
do your walking and as you're coming
back to where you're going to sit again
you have this thought oh that was such a
good sitting I think I'll do that again
and it doesn't happen and your mind is
getting restless so the natural thing to
do is say well I gotta try harder and
the harder you try the more Restless you
become and the more Restless you become
the harder it is to sit and the more
you'll come to me and complain that this
meditation doesn't work but honestly it
does and this works very well not just
regular well this works very well but if
you go into the end of your sitting
thinking I want something to happen the
way I want it to happen
now you're already caught in your
thinking and your emotional response to
that and want to do something to make it
better and the suffering arises right
after that and it's hard when there's a
lot of restlessness in your mind so what
do you do when you have a really tough
sitting and your mind is jumping all
over the place in and just this every
mind just decides I'm not going to be
anywhere near the object of meditation
what do you do how do you overcome that
problem the fastest and easiest way to
overcome restlessness is to laugh with
yourself for trying so hard chuckle just
to yourself oh there I go again as soon
as you laugh it changes your perspective
from i'm restless and i don't like it
too well it's only this Restless feeling
do I want to hang on to that or not now
let's let it go a lot of people when
they first start out on a retreat they
wind up putting in too much energy so
they come to me and now all my mind's
running all over the place so what do I
tell them you've got a smile more you
got to have fun with this meditation
stop being serious with the meditation
I've done I've done this meditation for
a lot of years ok it's a well over 35
and the first 20 years of the practice I
was extremely attached to putting in
more energy putting in more effort
because that's what I was told
it doesn't work instead of putting in
more energy you need to back off and not
put so much energy into it not try to
control it not try to make it be the way
you want it to be that's not your job
your job is to observe how mines
attention moves and use the six ours and
chuckle with yourself for trying so hard
I know this is really unusual I gave a
talk in Burma to monks that were working
on their masters and PhDs and some that
had their masters and PhDs and I told
them I'm gonna say a sentence that
you've never heard before in a
meditation retreat I want you to smile I
want you to have fun and I want you to
laugh and their dread their jaws dropped
open I said you've never heard that
before have you no not even close
because their teachers were always
telling them you gotta try harder you
got to put more energy into it more
effort into it and they caused
themselves problems because they were
putting in too much energy too much
effort so this is the opposite this is
step back and six are have fun with this
this is a fun meditation when I was in
South Korea this lady came up to me
after all five or six days of doing the
retreat she said I've been practicing
meditation for 10 years I've never had
any fun at a retreat and I'm
having fun with this it's really
interesting so the more you can have fun
and relax into these things and smile
the faster your progress in the
meditation becomes now when you're
picking a spiritual friend it does have
to be somebody of the same sex if you
pick somebody of the opposite sex you
have a tendency to have infatuation
coming up in your mind and you start
thinking about them more and more now
you're not meditating anymore so you
pick a friend that you really you admire
them real respect for them and you
sincerely do wish them well and you stay
with that spiritual friend until I tell
you to change this is a progressive kind
of meditation where you will go through
different stages and at different stages
I'll tell you to do different things now
the reason that I wanted most everybody
here to be doing the loving-kindness is
because with loving-kindness meditation
your progress is faster with this
meditation than it is with any other
meditation not a little bit a lot
so please just follow the directions
that I'm giving you so that you can see
what I'm talking about I don't want you
to believe anything that I say I want
you to experience what I'm talking about
and I sincerely wish you well so that
you can do this practice without getting
caught by too many distractions but
you're trying to develop the six hours
so that they can become automatic and
when that happens you really start
progressing very quickly now the
precepts are very very very important
don't break a precept on purpose if you
accidentally do break a precept come and
tell me and we'll take the precepts
again if you don't tell me your mind is
going to have a lot of restlessness in
and that can be a problem
the precepts and the hindrances are
intimately intertwined you break a
precept you're going to have hindrances
and the precepts are fairly easy to to
follow don't kill anything on purpose
now you might step on an ant or
accidentally step on something and it
might die but your intention wasn't to
do that your intention was just put your
foot down now that's not breaking the
preset but in Asia they love to
mosquitoes well that's intentionally
causing harm to other beings mind that
can happen with flies around here and
there's other other beasties there's i
saw i had a be in my room today and i
let him go free of course but don't
squash him just because don't take
anything that's not given no sexual
activity at all don't tell anything
let's say anything that's not true now
one of the problems that I had at one of
the retreats was people at getting close
to the end of the retreat they like to
sit around and talk about what their
different experiences was and somebody
that didn't have any clue what they were
talking about was listening and all of a
sudden they're coming and telling me
that's where they are well they're lying
that's breaking a precept you have to be
honest with me you have to be honest
and not taking any drugs or alcohol that
doesn't mean we can't take medicine you
can don't use any perfumes or
decorations for your body while for this
ten-day period okay so I wish you all
the highest and best success
one of the important questions that
never really gets answered when you go
to monk's that are teaching meditation
is I asked them very directly what is
craving and I got a bunch of assorted
answers and then it was like oh its
desire and things like that but I asked
them a follow-up question how do you
recognize when craving arises what are
you supposed to do with craving when it
arises how do you let go of craving this
is very important questions and it's a
necessary thing to really understand
that craving is the source of suffering
so
when you're sitting and meditation and
your mind gets distracted you'll notice
that there's a kind of tension or
tightness that happens in your head
around your brain there's a membrane
goes around your brain and I forgot the
whole trip I've been without my little
brain which drives me crazy anyway that
membrane is called the meninges and that
tension and tightness is how you
recognize that craving is present in
your mind there was some paperwork there
on the on the seat I don't know if
anybody picked any of that up that
should yeah yeah
craving always arises as tension and
tightness in your mind and in your body
and the way to let go of the craving is
by recognizing that there is tension and
tightness in your head and relax now a
lot of people when they practice
meditation they get caught up in
thinking and analyzing and trying to
control the thoughts and that is not how
you let go of craving
and there's there should be some little
yeah those have to be soon out and about
and in the afternoon and in the evening
now this being able to recognize craving
is an important part of this meditation
and this little piece of paper that you
have here it taught it's something you
can carry with you to remind you what
this process is this little piece of
paper is Right effort it's part of the
Eightfold Path i just added a couple
extra things and turn them all into ours
so it's easy to talk about i call it the
six ours the way you practice the six
artists is by recognizing that your mind
is distracted your mind is pulled away
from your object to meditation and i'll
talk about the object of meditation and
the bit then you let that distraction be
you don't get involved in the story
about the distraction you simply let go
of that distraction it doesn't matter
what it is it doesn't matter if it's
anger or dissatisfaction or just
thinking ho-hum thoughts whatever it is
you let go of that craving or you let go
of that distraction and you let go of
the distraction by not keeping your
attention on it if you keep your
attention on the distraction you're
feeding the distraction and it will last
longer and cause a lot of suffering
so you don't keep your attention on the
distraction I don't care what the
distraction is anything that pulls her
attention to it let it be don't get
involved with the story of it now you'll
notice that there's a tension and
tightness in your head in your brain and
you relax now that's the first part of
the six hours you recognize when your
mind is distracted you release the
distraction and you relax the next part
of the six ours is Yuri smile now this
meditation is a smiling meditation and
smiling although it doesn't seem like
it's very important is very important
because the more you smile while you're
doing your meditation the easier
mindfulness becomes what is mindfulness
mindfulness is remembering to observe
how minds attention moves from one thing
to another that's all mindfulness is so
you remember to observe that your mind
is distracted you let go of the
distraction don't keep your attention on
it even if you're in mid-sentence in
your mind just let it be don't pay
attention to it relax that tightness in
your head now you want to put a smile on
your lips a smile in your eyes a smile
in your mind and the smile in your heart
now you come back to your object of
meditation for this retreat for most of
you I want you to be practicing
loving-kindness meditation and I'll
explain more in just a moment but you
come back to the loving-kindness and
stay with the loving-kindness for as
long as you can it doesn't matter how
many times your mind gets distracted it
doesn't matter what the distraction is
you let it be you relax you smile you
come back to your object to meditation
and stay with your object to meditation
for as long as you can most people that
have practiced meditation before with
other people they hear that you have to
put in more energy and more effort and
actually you have to stop putting so
much energy and effort into doing this
if the thought doesn't go away it
doesn't matter if the tightness doesn't
go away never mind you just do it one
time smile come back to your object of
meditation if it's still there your mind
will go back to it then you do the same
thing again now some people when i was
in indonesia they were trying to use the
six RS on everything that arose in their
mind and you don't have to six are
everything that arises in your mind only
if it pulls your attention to it there
can be some background chitter-chatter
don't pay attention to it if it doesn't
pull your attention away don't six art
just stay with your object of meditation
eventually that will
fade away by itself one of the things
that the Buddha said was your attention
is nutriment their words if you keep
your attention on that distracting
thought you're feeding it and when you
feed it it gets bigger and stronger so
when you let go of it and don't keep
your attention on it you start to starve
that and eventually your mind will start
to settle down if you start your
meditation and your mind gets distracted
20 or 30 times in a sitting and you use
the six hours and practice that and come
back to your object to meditation that
is not a bad meditation it's an active
meditation but it's not a bad meditation
every time you let go of a distraction
and relax and smile and come back to
your object to meditation it improves
your mindfulness so you're able to
observe more quickly over a period of
time when your mind starts to get
distracted so I know that there's a lot
of meditation teachers that tell you
don't think and that's not an easy thing
and it takes many years to develop that
kind of practice but the Buddha said
that when you're on the path and you're
practicing Dhamma which is the teaching
of the Buddha that it is immediately
effective every time you let that
thought be
and relax and come back to your object
to meditation after smiling then you'll
notice that you don't have any thoughts
in your mind at that time your mind is
clear your mind is bright your mind is
very alert that is a pure mind why is it
pure because you have let go of the
craving so you bring this pure mind back
to your smile back to your object to
meditation and that means that this is
immediately effective because you have
let go of the craving when you're
practicing loving-kindness meditation
you first start by sending loving and
kind thoughts to yourself now if you've
already been practicing this for a while
this is not for you this is for people
that haven't haven't done this before
you think of a time when you were happy
when you held a little baby in your arms
or an animal or whatever it happened to
be and you felt that warm heart
connection with that being that is the
feeling of loving kindness so you bring
up that feeling and then you make a wish
for your own happiness you know what I
feels like to be happy you know what it
feels like to be peaceful and calm you
know what it feels like to be joyful
whatever wish you make for yourself you
need to feel that wish
and then take that wish and put it in
your heart and surround yourself with
that feeling and radiate that feeling to
yourself again it doesn't matter how
many times your mind gets distracted
every time your mind gets pulled away
it's not a bad thing it's just what's
happening in the present moment and it's
okay it has to be okay because that's
the truth when your mind is distracted
you have a distraction you don't need to
fight with the distraction you don't
need to try to make the distraction stop
putting in too much energy and that
causes a distraction to last longer so
all you do is simply use the six ours
you recognize your mind is distracted
you let the distraction be you relax the
tightness caused by that distraction re
smile come back to your object to
meditation stay with your object of
meditation as long as you can so the
first ten minutes of every sitting
please send loving and kind thoughts to
yourself after 10 minutes then you start
sending loving and kind thoughts to a
spiritual friend a spiritual friend is
someone of the same sex and they are
alive okay
so you need to stay with the same
spiritual friend until I tell you to
change so it's a person of the same sex
and they are alive a spiritual friend is
someone with that when you think of them
and their good qualities you really like
that person you sincerely do wish them
well so you stay with that spiritual
friend all the way through the city you
sit no less than 30 minutes to start off
with when you're sitting you want to sit
with your back nice legs straight not
leaning heavily into the chair but
nicely straight and don't move don't
wiggle your toes don't wiggle your
fingers don't scratch don't rub don't
change your posture don't rock back and
forth this is something that I've run
across lately if you want to see someone
that sits like that very well he does
you can move as much as he does so when
you're sitting in meditation you sit
very very still while you're sitting
like this there can be some sensations
that arise in your body you feel a
little stiff and feel some heat arising
you can feel an itch or want to cough
whatever it happens to be when that
pulls your attention to it then you use
the six ours you recognize that your
minds not on your object of meditation
you let it be by itself you relax Yuri
smile you come back to your object to
meditation your spiritual friend
and you stay with the same spiritual
friend all the time then you get up and
it's time to do some walking you stay
with the spiritual friend while you're
walking and wish them well when you're
doing your walking you don't walk slowly
you walk at a normal pace and your mind
isn't going to be used to it at first
and the walking as somewhat difficult
because you're used to walking around
thinking about this thinking about that
not paying attention to what you're
doing okay as soon as you notice that
then you six are and come back to your
spiritual friend you might stay with
them for three or four seconds before
your mind gets distracted again okay do
it again the six ours are the most
important part of this practice they
will carry you through to nibhana I
promise so anything that distracts your
mind that you want to let it be relax
smile come back to your spiritual friend
walk no less than 15 minutes if you're
walking is good walk longer when you're
walking keep your eyes down if you're
looking around at this or that and I
know there's a lot of stuff to look at
around here then that's where your mind
goes and all of a sudden you're thinking
about this or that so you have to six
are so keep your eyes nicely comfortably
down six or eight feet in front of you
while you're sitting if some kind of a
disturbance happens in your body you get
a pain in your knee you get an itch
someplace you feel like you need to
cough the first thing you need to do is
let it be don't keep your attention on
it and
now the nature of these kind of
sensations is they don't go away right
away so it's going to come back it's
going to be like it doesn't disappear it
just keeps on coming doesn't matter
every time you notice your attention has
gotten pulled to it then you let it be
and relax and smile and come back to
your object to meditation eventually one
of two things will happen either that
sensation will go away or it won't it
doesn't matter either way if it goes
away then it's easier to stay with your
object of meditation if it doesn't go
away your mind will start to get into a
sense of balance and it doesn't even
pull your attention to it anymore now
when you're sitting the sensation that
arises is there that's the truth any
time you try to fight with the truth any
time you try to control the truth any
time you try to make the truth be the
way you want it to be that is a cause of
suffering so you want to just allow that
sensation to be there without reacting
to it like you always act when an itch
comes up you always scratch it right
well now you just let it be it's not so
important
so sit comfortably if you are sitting
and you have a pain that arises and you
sit with it for a little while and it
doesn't go away and you know that you're
hurting your body in one way or another
and you know that by when you get up and
start to walk the pain doesn't go away
don't sit like that anymore we don't
want you to hurt yourself there is
something called a meditation pain and
that meditation pain when it arises and
is there and it can be real intense for
a period of time and then you get up and
start walking within five or ten seconds
it goes away that pain goes away that
means it's a meditation pain so if you
have a meditation pain and you start
recognizing that as a meditation pain
then just six are and let it be and
relax when your meditation is good sit
longer as long as you're comfortable but
if a meditation pain comes up that means
you have to roll up your sleeves a
little bit now it's time to go to work
and use your six hours look at how
tricky your mind becomes you'll start
thinking about boy I hate this feeling
when it comes up i really want to
scratch that itch every thought about
that sensation makes the sensation
bigger and more intense so the first
thing you want to do is notice that
you're thinking let go of the thinking
and relax
now you'll notice there's a tight mental
fist wrapped around that sensation that
tight mental fist is a version they
don't like that feeling don't want it
there so you allow it to be there and
you relax and let it be by itself smile
and come back to your object to
meditation your mind goes back to it
again you start having thoughts about it
again let go of the thoughts relax let
goals that tight mental fist Rep Tyrone
that and relax smile come back to your
object to meditation this is a process
of do it again okay always come back to
the six hours with anything that
distracts your mind any kind of movement
any kind of vibration any kind of
thought anything that pulls your
attention away is a distraction take
interest in sending your spiritual
friend kind and loving thoughts the more
interested you are in sincerely wishing
your friend well the easier it is to
stay with that friend when you start to
feel a little bit of sleepiness arise
this is called sloth and torpor the
reason that it arises is because you've
been with your spiritual friend for a
while and your mind starts thinking
these little tiny thoughts bite itself
and before long you start to get dreamy
and before long your posture start
slumping and before long you start
nodding and when you get
when you notice that quite often you
forget to use the six ours and you sit
up real straight I'm not going to let
that happen again and it happens again
the more interest you take in how that
arose the easier it is to let go of that
sleepiness all distractions happen in
exactly the same way a feeling arises
now feeling is not emotion feeling is
either a pleasant feeling or painful
feeling right after that feeling arises
there's tension and tightness that
happens in your head in your mind that
is craving right after that arises then
all of your thoughts all of your
opinions all of your ideas all of your
concepts all of your story about why you
like or dislike that feeling arises
right after that you get into your
habitual tendency of every time this
kind of thing arises I always do that
now this is where the emotional
attachment is stored and right after
that you have a birth of action and
sorrow lamentation pain grief and
despair and other words suffering arises
and you're taking that suffering
personally this is me this is mine this
is who I am this is my thoughts these
are my feelings that means that craving
is present in your mind at that time
you use the six ours you recognize when
your mind is distracted you release the
distraction you relax now you've let go
of that craving even if it's for a brief
moment you've let it go smile come back
to your object to meditation continue
with it as long as you can sometimes
it's only half of a wish for your
happiness before your mind gets
distracted again doesn't matter this is
a practice of patience
it's there yes it's real yes I don't
like it true but it's not yours you
didn't sit there and say well you know I
haven't had an itch for a long time it's
time to get some itches it arises
because the conditions are right for it
to arrive what you do with what arises
in the present moment dictates what
happens in the future now every
hindrance that arises has I am that
attached to it the hindrances are
exceptionally important hindrances are
not your enemy to fight with they're
just simply a distraction that pulls
your attention away you use the six
hours and you come back you don't need
to note it until it goes away thinking
thinking thinking thinking thinking and
then come back to your object of
meditation you don't need to note it all
you have to do is recognize that your
mind is distracted let the distraction
be there by itself don't keep your
attention on it don't feed the
distraction relax smile come back to
your object of meditation stay with your
object of meditation as long as you can
it's real simple now you can be sitting
in meditation and you're staying with
your object of meditation very nicely
and there's a distraction every now and
then that's fine you six are it and let
it be in
come back and then it's time to get up
and do your walking meditation you stay
with your spiritual friend while you're
getting up while you're going outside
while you're doing your walking and then
you come back and sit some more always
coming back to yourself for the first
ten minutes sending loving and kind
thoughts to yourself feel the wish that
you make for yourself i just gave you
some examples of a wish there are
sometimes people will come and get in
touch with me and they say i have a
friend that's really going through a
rough time right now and they're
thinking all the time can you help them
so i can give it a try so I start
sending loving and kind thoughts to that
person and the wish that I make for that
person is having an open accepting mind
but I have to feel that wish and put
that wish in my heart and surround that
person in my heart with this feeling of
having an open accepting mind and after
I do that for a little while I get in
touch with this person say well how are
they doing now oh they're much better
now meditation is not just sitting
meditation is life all different aspects
of your life you can use the six ours no
matter what you're doing with your daily
activities did you give them jobs to do
okay when you're doing whatever task she
is giving you that's the time to
practice your six hours I don't feel
like washing these dishes who doesn't
to who doesn't like it who wants it to
be different than it is you get caught
in those thoughts and those feelings now
you you're not practicing than six hours
you're not doing the meditation you have
to let go of your opinions and your
ideas and your thoughts about because
that's what the Buddha called clinging
and that leads to your emotional
reaction to it and that leads to me
putting in too much energy into much
effort and now you really get caught in
a cycle my mind is so active I can't do
anything with it it just keeps on going
and going and going okay fine stop
trying so hard you don't have to control
anything let it be there and relax and
smile and wish happiness to a friend
feel that feeling of your wish
the thing with a hindrance is that's
where you store your attachments and
attachments are always I am that so
every time you use the six hours you're
letting go of the attachment a little
bit at a time it's like putting a coin
in the bank putting it in a piggy bank
over a period of time you'll fill it up
but it takes a while and it takes some
work it's kind of funny people come to
me for the interview which I give every
day and they'll say I had a great
meditation my mind was so calm I could
stay with the object of meditation and I
kind of gone and go okay fine continue
everything's going fine but when you
come in and you start complaining about
your mind doing this or doing that ah
good meditation isn't it why is it good
because now you have to work now you're
really doing the meditation now you're
allowing this to be and relaxing and
smiling and coming back and whoops there
it goes again it doesn't matter how many
times your mind is distracted sometimes
there is an attachment that's real big
and real strong and it doesn't go away
very quickly great it's helping you to
improve your mindfulness how did your
mind go from being on your object of
meditation over to this distraction how
did it happen we don't care about why
that's for the psychologists they can
work with that only one we're trying to
see how this process of mine arising
actually
works what happens first what happens
right after that what happens after that
what happens after that the more you use
the six ours the faster your progress
and the meditation becomes promise and
I'm used to people progressing very
quickly now the thing with this
meditation is I don't want you to
experiment with well I learned this on
that retreat maybe I'll throw some of
this in now don't do that I've given you
a perfect recipe you start throwing
other things in it that recipe isn't
going to come out in the same way so you
need to just follow the directions that
I've given you as closely as you can
without adding anything without
subtracting anything using the six ours
often is the key now some of you are
practicing mindfulness of breathing and
because you've done this in the past and
you've been practicing with one pointed
concentration it's very easy to forget
about the relax step can't do that you
have to continue on the in breath relax
tension and tightness in your head in
your mind on the out-breath you relax
the tension and tightness in your head
in your mind on the in breath relax on
the out breath relax there's a
distraction let it be relax smile bring
that smiling pure mind back to your
object of meditation on the in breath
relax on the out breath relax
if you forget the relaxed step you are
going to tend towards one pointed
concentration and that means that the
end result of the retreat will not be
what you're really looking for the
relaxed step is by far the most
important part of the cigs ours and the
more you can use the six ours and
develop the habit of using the six hours
after a period of time it will start to
become automatic something starts to
arise in your mind and it'll just fade
away by itself so you stay with your
object omitted to keep using the relaxed
step now if you're doing mindfulness of
breathing you want to continue that
while you are walking keep your eyes
down don't let other things distract you
and I know the wind can be distracting
so it's just the wind so what doesn't
matter and I know that sometimes it gets
cold here well okay it gets cold so what
it's only a feeling I don't like being
cold who doesn't like it who has an
attachment in their mind at that time
this practice is much easier than most
people realize it's simple
all you have to do is every time your
mind goes anywhere I don't care what it
is I don't care how interesting it is
need to six are simply smile come back
to your object to meditation I want you
to smile from the time you get up in the
morning until you go to bed at night I
had some people they said well I don't I
don't want to meditate they're thinking
that meditation is just about sitting I
can't sit still okay don't smile all the
time and when you see you're not use the
six ours and start again now there's
three parts to meditation the first part
of meditation is practicing your
generosity how do you practice
generosity when you're in a retreat when
you are sending loving and kind thoughts
to your spiritual friend you are sending
that loving kind feeling to them you're
giving them your attention and you're
giving him the good feeling that you
have in your heart and wishing them
sincerely to be happy so you're
practicing your generosity track
practice your generosity with your
actions practice generosity with your
speech say things that make other people
smile although I don't want you talking
on this retreat and think kind loving
thoughts to your spiritual friend so
you're practicing generosity when you
are doing this
practice that softens your mind that
makes it easier to smile all the time
and I've had students that got to
exceptionally deep states of meditation
and I told them that they had to smile
and they came back with Wonder on their
face going it really does help so I
don't care what level of meditation
you're at smile the more you smile the
easier it is to notice how your minds
attention moves from one thing to
another and the faster you'll catch that
and you will start to get progress in
your meditation if you sit and have a
good sitting and then you get up and you
do your walking and as you're coming
back to where you're going to sit again
you have this thought oh that was such a
good sitting I think I'll do that again
and it doesn't happen and your mind is
getting restless so the natural thing to
do is say well I gotta try harder and
the harder you try the more Restless you
become and the more Restless you become
the harder it is to sit and the more
you'll come to me and complain that this
meditation doesn't work but honestly it
does and this works very well not just
regular well this works very well but if
you go into the end of your sitting
thinking I want something to happen the
way I want it to happen
now you're already caught in your
thinking and your emotional response to
that and want to do something to make it
better and the suffering arises right
after that and it's hard when there's a
lot of restlessness in your mind so what
do you do when you have a really tough
sitting and your mind is jumping all
over the place in and just this every
mind just decides I'm not going to be
anywhere near the object of meditation
what do you do how do you overcome that
problem the fastest and easiest way to
overcome restlessness is to laugh with
yourself for trying so hard chuckle just
to yourself oh there I go again as soon
as you laugh it changes your perspective
from i'm restless and i don't like it
too well it's only this Restless feeling
do I want to hang on to that or not now
let's let it go a lot of people when
they first start out on a retreat they
wind up putting in too much energy so
they come to me and now all my mind's
running all over the place so what do I
tell them you've got a smile more you
got to have fun with this meditation
stop being serious with the meditation
I've done I've done this meditation for
a lot of years ok it's a well over 35
and the first 20 years of the practice I
was extremely attached to putting in
more energy putting in more effort
because that's what I was told
it doesn't work instead of putting in
more energy you need to back off and not
put so much energy into it not try to
control it not try to make it be the way
you want it to be that's not your job
your job is to observe how mines
attention moves and use the six ours and
chuckle with yourself for trying so hard
I know this is really unusual I gave a
talk in Burma to monks that were working
on their masters and PhDs and some that
had their masters and PhDs and I told
them I'm gonna say a sentence that
you've never heard before in a
meditation retreat I want you to smile I
want you to have fun and I want you to
laugh and their dread their jaws dropped
open I said you've never heard that
before have you no not even close
because their teachers were always
telling them you gotta try harder you
got to put more energy into it more
effort into it and they caused
themselves problems because they were
putting in too much energy too much
effort so this is the opposite this is
step back and six are have fun with this
this is a fun meditation when I was in
South Korea this lady came up to me
after all five or six days of doing the
retreat she said I've been practicing
meditation for 10 years I've never had
any fun at a retreat and I'm
having fun with this it's really
interesting so the more you can have fun
and relax into these things and smile
the faster your progress in the
meditation becomes now when you're
picking a spiritual friend it does have
to be somebody of the same sex if you
pick somebody of the opposite sex you
have a tendency to have infatuation
coming up in your mind and you start
thinking about them more and more now
you're not meditating anymore so you
pick a friend that you really you admire
them real respect for them and you
sincerely do wish them well and you stay
with that spiritual friend until I tell
you to change this is a progressive kind
of meditation where you will go through
different stages and at different stages
I'll tell you to do different things now
the reason that I wanted most everybody
here to be doing the loving-kindness is
because with loving-kindness meditation
your progress is faster with this
meditation than it is with any other
meditation not a little bit a lot
so please just follow the directions
that I'm giving you so that you can see
what I'm talking about I don't want you
to believe anything that I say I want
you to experience what I'm talking about
and I sincerely wish you well so that
you can do this practice without getting
caught by too many distractions but
you're trying to develop the six hours
so that they can become automatic and
when that happens you really start
progressing very quickly now the
precepts are very very very important
don't break a precept on purpose if you
accidentally do break a precept come and
tell me and we'll take the precepts
again if you don't tell me your mind is
going to have a lot of restlessness in
and that can be a problem
the precepts and the hindrances are
intimately intertwined you break a
precept you're going to have hindrances
and the precepts are fairly easy to to
follow don't kill anything on purpose
now you might step on an ant or
accidentally step on something and it
might die but your intention wasn't to
do that your intention was just put your
foot down now that's not breaking the
preset but in Asia they love to
mosquitoes well that's intentionally
causing harm to other beings mind that
can happen with flies around here and
there's other other beasties there's i
saw i had a be in my room today and i
let him go free of course but don't
squash him just because don't take
anything that's not given no sexual
activity at all don't tell anything
let's say anything that's not true now
one of the problems that I had at one of
the retreats was people at getting close
to the end of the retreat they like to
sit around and talk about what their
different experiences was and somebody
that didn't have any clue what they were
talking about was listening and all of a
sudden they're coming and telling me
that's where they are well they're lying
that's breaking a precept you have to be
honest with me you have to be honest
and not taking any drugs or alcohol that
doesn't mean we can't take medicine you
can don't use any perfumes or
decorations for your body while for this
ten-day period okay so I wish you all
the highest and best success