From: https://youtube.com/watch?v=pElN6DFWbKI
Context: Throughout this transcript, Bhante Vimalaramsi is the speaker unless otherwise indicated.
guide to forgiveness meditation
an effective method to dissolve blocks
to loving kindness and living in the
present
by bonte vimelaromsi
copyright 2015-21 bonte vimela ramsay
all rights reserved
last updated november 2020
other books by bonte vimelaramsee
a guide to tranquil wisdom insight
meditation 2016.
meditation is life life is meditation
2014.
the dhamma leaf series 2014
moving dhamma volume 1 2012
wrath of love 2011 on upon a city suit
in 1998-2003
there is no question that forgiveness
meditation is part of loving-kindness
meditation development
it is the first step towards peace
acknowledgements
this booklet was based on a talk i gave
in 2012 at dsmc
it was done with the intention of making
a video for the internet concerning my
basic technique of working with
forgiveness and meditation
this talk is on our website i wish to
acknowledge van
sister kem is hard work in transcribing
this talk for seeing and conceiving a
potential book
for her primary editing and offering her
own additions and advice during final
editing
i also wish to thank a dearly departed
dhamma supporter
dr otherwingo for his contributions in
helping to improve the clarity of this
subject into a format for easier reading
this was a great contribution for us all
and david for final editing and
publishing in book form
forward
when van sister kemmer requested me to
write a forward to this booklet i
accepted the invitation with
considerable pleasure since i esteem
being associated with this literary
endeavor of unusual significance and
immense practical relevance
it is common knowledge that a large
number of books and other literary works
have been published on the subject of
all aspects of meditative practices
leading to loving-kindness meditation
the less discerning public might wonder
why another booklet on the same subject
the author perhaps anticipating such
hesitation and misgiving has stated the
principal objective of this booklet in
very clear and precise terms
without being far too exhaustive highly
specialized or too scholarly to be of
much practical help to the uninstructed
and uninitiated or even to the average
person seeking basic concise guidance
the author has provided us a brief clear
and simple handbook which is a much felt
need
even a cursory glance of the booklet
should make it clear that this booklet
is an entirely fresh orchestration of
most of the salient issues of
forgiveness meditation
often the author's language is unusually
illustrative
for instance here is a classic example
we can clear the runway for our
mindfulness of loving kindness to take
off by first learning to use mindfulness
of forgiveness meditation
this is an extremely powerful cleansing
practice
page 8 the buddhist supreme and timeless
proclamation of liberation of thought
and the prioritization of the mind over
25 centuries ago is now universally
accepted by modern day scientists
as humanity advances in with
intellectual development
the quest for spiritual solace enhances
this advancement
the author clearly indicates the
principle and unique feature of the
discipline of the mind through
meditation
this booklet shows in clear and simple
terms the way towards spiritual
cleansing and dispelling psychic
irritants
a commendable feature of this booklet is
that the treatment is basic but very
precise and comprehensive
i have no doubt whatsoever that this
booklet will help the readers towards
meaningful practice of forgiveness
meditation leading to the successful
practice of loving kindness meditation
bhavatu sabha mangalam may you have all
good blessings
van handana abbott
staten island buddhist vihara
introduction
the buddha was a meditation teacher he
taught meditation for 45 years after he
became fully awakened
when you study and practice meditation
you will not be entirely successful
until you master the definitions and
interwoven nature of two words
meditation and mindfulness i can give
you the definitions but then you must
experience for yourself how these two
work together
in the buddhist teachings meditation
means observing the movement of mind's
attention moment to moment
in order to see clearly how the links
depend on origination actually work
mindfulness means remembering to observe
how mind's attention moves from one
thing
to another this use of mindfulness
actually causes mind to become sharper
as you go as you experience more subtle
states of mind
it isn't hard to see why you must
develop this precise mindfulness to keep
the meditation going smoothly
many people practice loving kindness
meditation but
according to a few people the power of
it doesn't seem to change much for them
in their daily lives
if it doesn't take off quite right in
the beginning we might run into
difficulty with this practice and it can
be like hitting a wall
it's good to know that there is a key to
the solution for developing meta in our
daily activities
that solution is learning to smile as
much as you can remember
apparently in some cases if we do get
into trouble
we can clear the runway for our
mindfulness of loving kindness to take
off by first learning to use mindfulness
of forgiveness meditation
this is an extremely powerful and
cleansing practice
forgiveness is a form of loving kindness
that really clears our mind of negative
or unwholesome states
the reason this book came into being is
because of the many questions teachers
are asked about why doesn't my meta
arise easily
it is because we need to forgive
ourselves first before we can send out
pure love to others
chapter 1 preparation
at times there can be confusion about
how to effectively practice this
mindfulness
of forgiveness meditation so this
booklet is dedicated only to this
meditation on forgiveness so you can
begin the practice with a clear goal and
better understanding
when people are practicing loving
kindness meditation
you might run into a barrier as you try
to send out loving kindness to yourself
and to others if this happens after a
few days
and you are not successful in feeling
the meta in the retreat
it may be suggested for you to take a
step back and start doing the
forgiveness meditation to
overcome these blocks after all we
cannot sincerely send loving kindness
and forgiveness to someone else when we
do not have it for ourselves
this practice is not just used for a
person pursuing loving kindness and
compassion meditation
any person can make the commitment to
clean house by doing this forgiveness
work
after this is done for the first time
one feels many years younger
because oftentimes a great weight has
been lifted off your heart and mind
some people have the idea that this
meditation is a completely different
kind of meditation from the loving
kindness meditation
that is not so it should be made clear
from the beginning that the forgiveness
meditation is not outside of the
development of loving kindness and is a
part of meta
for anyone who has difficulty in feeling
loving kindness this can be the first
step
it creates a firm bridge between heart
and mind that is then used to help all
other kinds of meditation succeed
it is a cleansing for the heart another
opening of the heart we can add to our
initial practice of generosity
in truth this meditation is probably the
most powerful meditation that i know
it can clear away mental blocks that pop
up from old attachments or dislikes
towards various people
or events that happen to you and your
past life experiences
if you follow directions closely and you
are patient when you practice
then pain and suffering will gradually
dissolve any hard-heartedness you still
carry in your mind
about past life wounds when you practice
forgiveness meditation
all of the basic rules will remain the
same
you still sit in a reasonably quiet
space to do this work
be sure you are wearing loose
comfortable clothing
sit in a comfortable position on the
floor or in a chair
if you do use a chair don't lean into
the back of the chair
sit with your spine nicely straight but
not tightly erect
sit in a position that does not bring up
physical pain in general for you
you should follow the basics of
practicing right effort using tranquil
wisdom insight meditation
twim and the six rupees for your
meditation cycle to accomplish your goal
when you practice sit for a minimum of
30 minutes each time
sit longer if things are going smoothly
and you have the time
at whatever time you decide to break
your sitting stand up slowly
keep your observation going as you stand
up
stretch slowly if desired while you are
sitting
do not move at all don't wiggle your
toes
don't scratch if your body needs to
cough or sneeze
do not hold this in just sneeze or cough
keep some tissues close by for any tears
that might arise
if tears do fall then let them come
that is what you have holes in your
eyelids for so
let the tears come out this releases the
pressure
consider this the cleansing time before
you take up any other primary
meditations
while practicing forgiveness meditation
please use only these meditation
instructions and put all other
meditation instructions aside until you
have completed the work
this just means that we don't want to
confuse mind so
don't mix up the recipe we want only the
information needed to do this practice
chapter 2 instructions
the way you start practicing forgiveness
meditation is by forgiving yourself
there are different kinds of statements
that you can use for this to help bring
up any old grudges and hard-heartedness
locked inside you
you may pick one statement to begin and
then you stay with that statement for a
period of time
to give it a chance to settle in in you
and see what comes up
the first suggested phrase is i forgive
myself for not understanding
everybody has misunderstandings that
happen in their life
nobody is exempt from this fact while
you are sitting in meditation
you repeat the phrase i forgive myself
for not understanding
after you've done that you put that
feeling and wish into your heart and
stay with that sense of forgiveness
when that feeling fades away or the mind
gets distracted
then you come back and forgive yourself
for not understanding yet again
repeat the phrase to yourself this is a
methodology
the way it works follows
silently say the phrase to yourself i
forgive myself for not
understanding let it be an open
statement or intention
continue with this phrase as the feeling
or the wish of forgiveness fades then
say the phrase again
when a disturbing thought comes up about
a past incident or person then forgive
that person or person
or yourself and then relax any tightness
that is left
there will be a painful feeling that
arises and your mind won't like it
this where the relaxed step is so
important if we react to the pain then
this keeps the cycle going
you are feeding it through your aversion
when you bring up this painful incident
you don't like and even hate this
feeling this leads to beating yourself
up and not accepting that this is only a
memory and it is long gone
accept whatever comes up and forgive and
then relax
forgive relax this is what you do each
time
if it is just a distraction or a
wandering mind then forgive that too
forgive anything that takes you away
from forgiving yourself
then return to your phrase yet again i
forgive myself for not understanding
do this cycle over and over you forgive
yourself first
you are the object of the meditation
then while you are forgiving yourself
you forgive anything that distracts you
from wishing yourself forgiveness
gradually disturbances fade away and you
are left with yourself
finally in the present relief arises in
the mind by throwing off these painful
memories and letting go of the reactive
mind that arises right after
for those familiar with the jannas and
have meditated before
it is necessary to not go higher than
the first jhana
you can't mentally verbalize beyond that
say your phrases for forgiveness
please make a determination to not go
any deeper
this is an active contemplative process
that we are doing now
while you're doing this your mind is
going to have some resistance to this
meditation
your mind is going to take off and say
well
this is stupid i shouldn't be doing this
reactions like these are part of your
attachments
these are the obstacles that we must
dissolve
stay with your statement and repeat i
forgive myself for not
understanding then your mind might say
ah i don't need to do this anymore
this meditation doesn't work every
thought that pulls you away from
forgiving yourself for
not understanding is an attachment and
has to be let go and the tension and
tightness and that attachment must be
relaxed away
this is where you will use your
forgiveness any distractions or any sort
of disturbances must be forgiven
to forgive we notice we have been
distracted away from our object of
meditation or what we are doing in the
present moment
we then forgive the distraction and then
relax
relax that tension and tightness that
arises from the distraction or
disturbance
it doesn't matter how many times your
mind gets distracted
one thing that many people get caught
with is getting wrapped up in the story
about things
and this can cause lots of pain and
suffering along with some frustration
forgiveness will help you with strongly
attachments and it shows the way to
overcome the suffering they cause
recognize it let it be
relax smile come back and stay with the
feeling of forgiveness for as long as
you can
sitting should be followed by walking
practice
if you are going to continue sitting
again where you are going to return to a
task in daily life
before you do take a stroll at a normal
pace to keep your blood flowing nicely
walk for about 15 minutes minimum in
some fresh air
45 minutes is a good maximum time for
walking
if you are working in a restricted space
setting find a space that is level and
at least 30 feet long in length
walk back and forth and mentally keep
your meditation going
when you walk you want to walk in a way
that you repeat the phrases with each
stride as you walk
like this with a left foot take a step
and mentally say then a right step
forgive and left you
then again but say you on the right step
and then left step forgive right step
me and repeat back and forth
you can experiment and see what works it
can get into a nice cadence but all the
while it is really getting it into your
noggin to forgive
i forgive you you forgive me and keep
smiling when you are doing this
and forgive anything or anyone who comes
up that takes you away
stay with the walking i used to go for
six to eight mile walks in hawaii doing
just this practice
the idea of sitting and walking is to
create a continuous flow of meditation
without stopping
this proves you can keep the meditation
with you all the time in life
while walking at this normal pace
continue doing the forgiveness
meditation with your eyes looking down
towards the ground about six or seven
feet in front of you
do not look around keep on gently
forgiving
keep smiling all the time
chapter 3 attachments
one mistake that an awful lot of people
make is they say
well meditation is just for sitting the
rest of the time i don't have anything
else to do
so i can let my mind act like it always
does
this is a mistake we need to consider
the idea that meditation is life and
life is meditation
you want to realize that you have
attachments in your daily life and just
because you are not sitting doesn't mean
those attachments aren't there
the whole point in doing the meditation
is for personality development
it's for letting go of old habitual
suffering bhava
and in place of this developing a mind
that is equanimity in it
the more resistance your mind has in
doing this the more you need to do it
because the resistance is your mind
showing you where your attachment is
and that is the cause of suffering this
meditation works better than anything
that i know of for letting go of
attachments
letting go and relaxing of old
hard-hearted feelings bhava
letting go of the way you think the
world is supposed to be so you can start
accepting the way the world actually is
your mind might say well i don't like
that
i don't like the way they said this or
that ask yourself now
who doesn't like it who is judging and
condemning
who is making up a story who is caught
by their attachment
well i am it might be helpful here to
give a definition of attachment
an attachment is anything we take
personally any thought
any feeling any sensation when we think
these thoughts or feelings are mine
this is me this is who i am at that
point
mind has become attached and this causes
craving to arise in your mind and body
craving always manifests as a tension or
tightness in both mind and body
craving is the i like it i don't like it
mind
which arises in everyone's mind slash
body process
attachment is another word for craving
and is the start of all suffering
when we see that everything that arises
is part of an impersonal process
then we begin to understand what it is
like to see things with a clear
observant mind
somebody might say something very
innocently and you hear it through your
attachment and it's negative
this is why we have to learn how to
become aware of what is happening all
the time in our daily lives
when you get finished sitting in your
meditation for 30 minutes
45 minutes or for an hour and you start
walking around
what does your mind do it takes off just
like it always does
it thinks about this it thinks about
that
this is just nonsense thoughts most of
us think those thoughts and those
feelings that arise are ours personally
that they are not just random things but
in truth
if you feed any kind of a thought or
feeling with your attention
you make it bigger and more intense when
you realize that you are causing your
own suffering you have to forgive
yourself for doing that
this means saying i forgive myself for
not understanding
i forgive myself completely of course
your mind is going to take off again and
say ah this is stupid
this is nothing this isn't real
this isn't what is actually happening i
don't want to do this
every one of those thoughts is an
attachment isn't it
every one of those thoughts has craving
in it doesn't it
every one of those thoughts is causing
you suffering right
because of this you have to recognize
that you are doing this to yourself and
let go of those thoughts
that's just nonsense stuff anyway it
doesn't have anything to do with what
you are doing and where you are right
now
once you know this you forgive yourself
for not understanding
for causing yourself pain for causing
other people pain
you really forgive take a look at when
you are walking from here to there
what are you doing with your mind ho hum
thinking about this and i gotta do that
and i have to go talk to that person and
i have to do this all of that's nonsense
now this doesn't mean that you can't
plan what you need to do next
you can but just do that planning one
time as your primary topic in the
present moment
after you make up your mind what the
plan is you don't have to think about it
anymore
repeating it rolling it around again all
of that is just part of your old
habitual tendency
bhava and pali it is your old
conditioned thoughts and feelings
and taking them personally and causing
yourself pain and suffering
chapter 4 daily practice
including the exercise of forgiveness in
your daily activity is by far the most
important part of this meditation
you forgive yourself continually for not
understanding
for getting caught up in this or that
for taking things personally
how many times have you found yourself
doing this
hey i don't like the way you said that
ask yourself wh oh doesn't like what
well you said something that was hurtful
to whom
you need to stop and realize that you're
taking all this stuff personally and
it's not really personal
it's just stuff that happens forgive it
forgive it even when you're walking
along a road and you happen to kick a
rock and it hurts
forgive the pain for being there your
job is to keep your mind forgiving all
the time
that's what mindfulness of forgiveness
meditation practice is all about
the technique is not just about when you
are sitting
this is a life practice this is an all
the time practice
if you want to really begin to change
you have to be willing to go through the
forgiveness sincerely
because it will help you change a lot
you have to have patience and it helps
to have a sense of humor about just how
dumb mind can be
the more you smile and laugh the easier
the meditation becomes
chapter 5 finding balance
whenever you personally continue to
think about this and that to judge this
and condemn that
you are constantly causing yourself
suffering you don't need to do that
you want to argue with other people
about your attachments
what's the point when you really start
practicing forgiveness for yourself
or forgiveness for another person your
mind starts to get into balance and your
sense of humor begins to change
this is equanimity then you don't take
thoughts
feelings and sensations and all this
other stuff personally
when you practice in this way you are
seeing life for what it is and allowing
it to be there
it's not worth going over it in your
mind and over it
and over it and over it it's not worth
it
it's a waste of time it's a waste of
effort
every time you have a repeat thought you
are attached
you're identifying with that thought and
you're taking it personally and that is
again the cause of suffering
what you are seeing here is the second
noble truth
you are witnessing how craving taking it
personally is the cause of suffering
and you can't blame anybody else for it
it's yours
you are doing it all to yourself well
they said this so what
others may have their opinion that
doesn't mean i have to listen to them
i don't have to take it in personally
and analyze whether it's correct or not
because it doesn't matter the more you
forgive in your daily life and daily
activities
the easier it is to forgive the big
things that happened in the past
chapter 6 persistence
when you're doing the forgiveness
meditation while you're sitting
you're staying with one of the suggested
statements you stay with that one
statement until you internally feel
yes i really do forgive myself for not
understanding
it's important to work this through to
really forgive can take a while
it's not just some quick fix to do in
one sitting and then you come in and say
okay now i'm done where you say i've
already done that
doing that is not where you're going to
get real change
nope you still have your attachments
there
you still have to continually forgive
yourself for not understanding
forgive yourself for making a mistake
that is what not understanding is about
you have to forgive yourself for judging
for condemning
for analyzing for thinking for getting
angry
forgive everything all of the time
when i started to do the forgiveness
meditation which
i did personally for myself for two
years because i wanted to make sure i
really understood this meditation
i went through major changes there were
major changes
major personality changes if you want
that for yourself
you have to have that kind of patience
this idea of
well i've already forgiven this person
or that person
that simply isn't it a little later on
you figure out that you're talking about
how you didn't like this or that from
them
ah guess what who hasn't finished their
forgiveness meditation
you haven't forgiven yourself or the
other person
chapter 7 going deeper
when you start to go deeper in your
meditation staying with the forgiveness
and you do forgive yourself for making
mistakes there can come a time when
somebody comes up into your mind that
you need to forgive
when this happens you realize that you
did not ask them to come up
you do not stop and say well i need this
person to come up
they came up by themselves as soon as
that person comes up
you start forgiving them for not
understanding
it doesn't matter what they did in the
past all of your thoughts
all of your opinions of what they did in
the past just keep bringing up more
suffering
these thoughts come up because of your
attachment i didn't like that
i didn't want that to happen they are a
dirty no good so and so because they did
that to me
can you guess where the attachment is
guess where the idea comes from that i
can blame somebody else for my own
suffering
the only person you can blame for your
suffering is yourself
why because you were the one that took
it personally
you're the one who had an opinion about
it you're the one that used your
habitual tendencies over and over again
to justify the idea
that i'm right and you're wrong that's
how we cause our own suffering
the forgiveness meditation helps you let
go of that opinion
that idea that attachment and feel some
relief
because some past person did or said
something that caused anger
resentment jealousy pain or whatever the
catch of the day was
it can have a real tendency for your
mind to get caught up in thinking about
that past event
this is called getting caught by the
story you need to forgive getting caught
by the story and then go back to your
forgiveness statement
it does not matter how many times the
story arises forgive yet again
the story's emotion will fade away after
you do this enough
this is where patience is needed
chapter 8 letting go
when you see someone else come up in
your mind somebody you really had a
rough time with and you didn't like it
someone you started hating for whatever
reason you forgive them
with your mind's eye you look them
straight in their eye and you tell them
sincerely
i forgive you for not understanding the
situation i forgive you for causing me
pain
i forgive you completely now
keep that person in your heart and
radiate forgiveness to them
if your mind has a distraction and it
pulls you away from that
you might hear in your mind no i don't
that no good so and so i won't forgive
him
let go of this and come back and say i
do forgive you
it has to be sincere well i'm not going
to forgive that dirty no good so and so
why not because they caused me suffering
oops wh o caused who suffering
you caused your own self-suffering
because you took it personally
and you reinforced that with a lot of
thoughts and opinions and ideas about
why that was wrong
in other words you were caught in your
craving your own clinging
your habitual tendencies and that leads
to more and more dissatisfaction
aversion pain and suffering chapter 9
relief
it's really important to realize that
this is not an easy practice
it's hard to forgive someone when they
have really caused you harm
take a woman that has been raped or a
man who has been beaten and robbed
it's hard to forgive the person who
raped them or beat them because they
have been violated
but holding on to their hatred of that
person is keeping them attached
it doesn't matter what the action was it
doesn't matter what happened in the past
what matters is what you are doing with
what you have in your mind right now
to completely develop this practice to
the highest level means that you keep
forgiving and forgiving
over and over with your mind's eye you
look them straight in the eye and you
say
i really do forgive you and your mind
says
no i don't and you let that go and come
back
you say i really do forgive you
then take that person and put them in
your heart and continue to radiate
forgiveness to them
how long do you do that as long as it
takes
for some attachments one or two sittings
is all you will need
some other attachments might take a week
might take two weeks or even longer
who knows it doesn't matter
if you need time you can take time you
have all the time there is
you will feel a very very strong sense
of relief when you let go of the hatred
you have towards these people
then anytime you think of them you kind
of think of them with a mind that says
well they made a mistake they didn't
know what they were doing
it's okay that's how you let go of an
attachment
craving that's how you let go of the
pain of that past situation
this doesn't mean that the person who
was violated is going to go up and hug
the person who did that to them
they would avoid them because they know
there is a possibility of personal harm
but they don't hate them anymore they
don't think about it anymore
they have let it go that's what the
forgiveness is all about
it's about letting go you are giving up
old dissatisfaction and dislike
you are developing a mind that says well
that's okay
you can be like that that is not taking
it personally
chapter 10 obstacles
the biggest part of the mindfulness of
forgiveness meditation is learning how
to let go of your personal opinions
ideas concepts stories
you might stay with a person for a long
period of time because of your opinions
and your attachment to this
every time you are doing any walking or
sitting meditation
keep forgiving them over and over again
your mind might get bored with that and
say
oh i don't want to do this anymore
well that's another kind of attachment
isn't it
so what do you do with that you have to
get through it by forgiving the boredom
for being there
that's okay your mind is tricky
it's going to try to distract you any
way it can
it'll bring up any kind of feelings and
thoughts and ideas to distract you
because it doesn't like the idea of
giving up attachments
your mind really feels comfortable
holding onto attachments
we need to go easy on ourselves as we
develop this practice
after all how many years did it take us
to build up our habits
bhava it takes patience to move in the
opposite direction now and to change
those on wholesome mind states into new
wholesome tendencies
be kind to yourself and take your time
the whole point of the meditation is
learning how to change
learning how to let go of those old
nonsense ideas and thoughts and develop
new ideas and thoughts that make you
happy and make other people around you
happy too
that's the whole reason for the precepts
they outline an option for us to follow
so we gain balance in our life
let's take a quick look at the precepts
do not kill any living beings on purpose
don't take what is not freely given to
you no stealing
don't engage in wrong sexual activity
with another person's mate or a person
too young living with their parents
in short don't do anything that will
cause mental or physical harm to any
other human being
don't engage in telling lies using harsh
language
gossip or slander lastly
don't take recreational drugs or alcohol
because these will weaken mind and the
tendency to break the other precepts is
stronger
these precepts are like an ultimate
operational manual for life
if you keep them well then you get the
most out of your life
they make you and others around you
happy the more you can continually
follow them
the better your frame of mind will
become you will more easily forgive that
other person
your mind will become softer towards
that person and you will feel more
relief
what happens is after you practice this
way for a while
then you go ah i do i really do forgive
you
and there's no energy behind it at all
it's just like yeah this happened it's
in the past
it's no big deal this is what
forgiveness is all about
chapter 11 daily life
how can this practice affect your daily
life this is a good question
you're more open you're more accepting
you're not judging
you're not condemning you're not
disliking
because as you see that tightness of
mind coming up in you
and you go oops i forgive you for not
understanding this one
and you smile you let it go
one of the hardest things a guiding
teacher has to do is to teach people
that life is supposed to be fun
it's a game keep it light
if you play with your mind and your
attachments that means you are not being
attached to them so much
as you play with them you're not taking
them so seriously anymore
when you don't take them seriously
they're easier to let go of
that's what the buddha was teaching us
he was teaching us how to have an
uplifted mind all
of the time how to be able to be light
with your thoughts with your feelings
and your ideas and your past actions
yes it's true on some occasion you made
a mistake
well okay welcome to the human race
i don't know of anyone who hasn't made a
mistake and felt guilty about it
sure they do and what is that guilt
non-forgiveness that's an example of
your mind grabbing on to what's
happening and saying
i really screwed up and i need to punish
myself for that
that's what your mind is saying now do
you see what you can do about this
right the more you become serious with
your daily life
the more attachments you will have the
less equanimity
the less mental balance you will have in
your life
there is no question about it you're on
these roller coasters
emotional roller coasters up and down up
and down
up and down when you start forgiving
more
those high highs and low lows start to
turn into little waves
you still have some but you don't get
caught for as long
you just stop and say this just isn't
important enough to get upset about
chapter 12 success
after you forgive that person you stay
with them you stay with that person
that's come up into your mind until you
feel like
enough i don't have to do this anymore
i really have forgiven you at that point
with your mind's eye you look them
straight in the eye and you stop
verbalizing and you hear them say back
to you
i forgive you too wow
now this is different isn't it it's kind
of remarkable
you have this feeling of being forgiven
as well as you forgiving them
you've forgiven yourself for making
mistakes for not understanding
you've forgiven that other person for
making mistakes for not understanding
or causing pain whatever you want using
the statement that really makes it true
for you
and now you hear them say i forgive you
there is a real sense of relief wow
what happens in your mind now is that
joy comes up in your mind
you feel light you feel really happy
happier than you ever felt before you
didn't realize you were carrying these
big bundles of rocks on your shoulders
holding you down did you and now
you have put them down when you forgive
the heaviness of those hard feelings and
rocks disappear
you feel light oh my this really is
great stuff
it takes a lot of work but it's worth it
it's not easy why isn't it easy because
of the amount of attachment we have when
we begin
you keep doing the meditation and when
you get done with one person
you go back to yourself you repeat i
forgive myself for making mistakes
i forgive myself for not understanding
you stay with yourself until somebody
else comes up into your mind
you keep on doing that until your mind
says okay
i've done it everything is good
there's nobody else enough
at this time you can switch back to your
mindfulness of loving-kindness
meditation and make it your primary
formal practice
now you can understand why mindfulness
of forgiveness meditation is definitely
part of loving-kindness
how can you ever practice loving
kindness if you have hatred
you can this practice releases the
hatred
chapter 13 not easy
this practice has no simple easy fast
fix here
you can't just buy the solution this
time at the mall either
you have to patiently continue this
practice all the time until you release
the unwholesome mind states which are
your old habitual tendencies of mind
depending how attached you are to the
idea that a person wronged you
or the idea of how badly you screwed up
this leads you into i can never forgive
myself
until you finally go through this
process of forgiveness
you will not be free of this burden you
will know when you have gone entirely
through the mindfulness of forgiveness
meditation because then you will be free
and you will see clearly this is how
forgiveness really works
are you done you don't have to have
anybody to tell you that this worked
you'll know the daily continuous work of
this practice is most
important when you are walking from one
place to another
i don't care what you are doing any kind
of distraction that comes up
forgive it smile if a person comes up to
you and they start talking and you don't
want to talk
forgive them they don't understand
they don't understand what you're doing
it's okay that they don't understand
it's okay that they don't know where you
are or what you are doing
they can judge you they can condemn you
they can cause all kinds of distractions
and that's fine they can do that
but as for you you can forgive them for
it
as you are forgiving them you are
letting go of the attachment to the way
i think things are supposed to be
not understanding can be a really big
thing
because we don't understand so much we
have our own opinions and ideas of the
way things are supposed to work
that can be a problem we get caught up
by assumption
that's it isn't it what happens when
things don't match your idea of the way
things are supposed to work
what then you may find yourself fighting
with reality which is the truth
the dharma of the present moment you're
not accepting the reality that's right
there in front of you
you begin judging and condemning and
most often
blaming somebody else for disturbing you
well i'm sorry they're not disturbing
your practice
they are part of the practice there's no
such thing as something else
or someone else disturbing my practice
it's only me fighting with what is real
the reality
the dhamma of the present moment not
liking this or that
and next i am blaming somebody else or
something else for the cause of that
chapter 14 forgive it
what about sounds disturbing us while we
practice
sometimes in a retreat if you are
concentrating too hard you can observe
what can happen
you could get so upset if there is even
one squeak of a door
or someone is walking by too heavily
near you or breathing too loudly
you might jump up thinking oh you
disturbed my practice
do you begin to see how ridiculous this
actually is
what is happening here is that the
present moment produced a noise
and there was noise and then mind came
up and said
i don't like this that's not supposed to
be there
i want to complain to somebody and make
them stop so my mind can be peaceful
what is actually happening is
concentration is out of balance with
mindfulness
concentration is too strong and
mindfulness is too weak
hahaha how crazy is that
if you can't accept what's happening in
the present moment with a balanced mind
there will be suffering okay
so there's a noise there's somebody
talking
so it doesn't matter just as long as you
have mindfulness and equanimity in your
mind
when balance is in your mind if there is
a noise
that's just fine and
you can do your forgiveness meditation
while i was in asia on a three-month
retreat
there was a water well pump that was
drilling for water right outside of the
meditation hall
three months of an old clanky motor
running from eight o'clock in the
morning until six o'clock at night
this can happen you know one continuous
noise
it was really loud and really annoying
but it was just
sound that's all it was i realized that
it was not my sound
my dislike of that sound wasn't going to
change that sound
my criticizing of the person that
started the motor wasn't going to make
that sound any different
do you see where all the attachments are
in this example
the exercise here is accepting the fact
that sound is here
and it's okay for sound to be here it
has to be okay
because that's what's in the present
moment
that's the truth dhamma accepting the
present moment is accepting the dhamma
just as it is
whenever there is a disturbance forgive
the disturbance continually in your mind
forgive smile forgive yourself for not
understanding
that is how we work with forgiveness in
daily life
i forgive myself for wanting things to
be more perfect than they are
i forgive myself for making mistakes i
forgive myself for being angry
and disliking this or that now we see
that the forgiveness is not just one
statement
it can be many we take each of these
statements into the practice and use
them one by one
chapter 15 no mantras
while you're doing your sitting practice
once again
you just want to take one statement of
forgiveness at a time
stay with just one remember this is not
a mantra
you don't just casually repeat this and
then think about something else
either it must be sincere i really do
forgive myself for making mistakes or
for not understanding or whatever
it's important to be sincere when you do
this
the more you can continually forgive
with your daily activities
with your sitting with your walking
meditation whatever you happen to be
doing
you need to realize that this is what
meditation is really about
meditation is not about gaining some
superhuman state of mind
it's not just about bliss it is more
productive than that
it's about learning how you cause your
own suffering and how to let go of that
suffering
the deeper superhuman states of
meditation will come up by themselves
when we clear our minds and simply allow
this to happen
you don't have to personally do anything
the more you clear yourself
the more you clear your mind of
judgments opinions
concepts ideas and the more you accept
what's happening in the present moment
the more joyful life becomes the easier
life becomes
what's that you are saying now well i
have this habit of always analyzing and
thinking
okay let it go but i have been doing
this my whole life
so hey forgive yourself for not
understanding
forgive yourself for analyzing there can
be a strong attachment to wanting to
analyze
that's the western disease i want to
know how everything works
you don't learn how things work by
thinking about them you let go and relax
to see how things work when you forgive
and you let go and relax to develop
space in your mind to observe how they
work
the truth is that in meditation thinking
mind
analyzing mind is incredibly slow the
aware mind is incredibly fast
it's extraordinary you just can't get
there with a lot of words in the way
you can't have opinions in the way they
will block you
they will stop you from seeing the way
things truly are
chapter 16 blame game
your forgiveness meditation is more than
just about old attachments like
well when i was five years old little
johnny
he beat me up and i've hated him ever
since then
see how this is about you and uncovering
this attachment and how you hold on to
it
and how you cause yourself pain because
of that attachment
most especially these days people are
really big on blaming everybody but
themselves for their pain
and the question here should be is that
working with reality or not
it's easy to say you cause me pain
i don't like you but did someone else
cause you pain
or did i just say something and you had
another kind of an opinion
and judged and condemned whatever i said
and then your aversion came up
and the dislike of the whole situation
and now you're off to the races and
you're a thousand miles away
you are causing yourself pain and you're
running into your thinking
but i'm only thinking and analyzing ha
ha ha ha ha
you're attached you think this
attachment won't hurt me so much if i
keep distracted
i can keep my opinions and my ideas
about the way things are supposed to be
and then i don't have to change but
you're fooling yourself
change is the only way to free mind
meditation is about positive change
chapter 17 be happy
in summary buddhism is about realizing
that you need to have a balanced and
mindful mind
that doesn't have high emotions in it
that doesn't have attachments in it
so that you can see things clearly and
discover real happiness and contentment
in daily life
buddhism is about seeing the way things
truly are gaining knowledge by seeing
for yourself how you are the cause of
your own pain
it's about taking personal
responsibility and doing the work needed
to find this kind of mindfulness
balance and understanding mindfulness of
forgiveness meditation trains us to
recognize clearly when suffering arises
first noble truth to notice how we get
personally involved with it and make it
bigger which causes more suffering in
life
second noble truth and to escape this
dangerous trap by using the six
r's and seeing how it disappears third
noble truth
this meditation opens the way for clear
understanding and relief
fourth noble truth the end result
creates the space we need
in our mind so that we begin to respond
to life instead of reacting
using the six r's which fulfills the
practice of right effort found in the
early texts
using it with any meditation you are
doing this is one of the fastest ways
for all people to see clearly what is
really going on and to reach this kind
of destination where there can be
happiness and peace
in suta number 21 of the midshima nikaya
as translated by bikubodi
within the middle length sayings and
published by wisdom publications
it gives us some excellent advice that i
would like to share with you now
it says there are these five courses of
speech that others may use when they
address you
their speech may be timely or untimely
true or untrue
gentle or harsh connected with good or
connected with harm
spoken with a mind of loving kindness or
with inner hatred
this is how i should train my mind shall
be unaffected
and i will utter no evil words i shall
abide compassionate for their welfare
with a mind of loving kindness without
inner hate
i shall abide pervading that person
whoever you talk with
with a mind imbued with loving kindness
and forgiveness
and starting with him i shall abide
pervading the all-encompassing world
with a mind imbued with loving kindness
abundant exalted immeasurable without
hostility and without ill will
that is how i should train please use
this forgiveness meditation often and
train your mind to be happy
about the author
the principal guiding teacher is our
avid most venerable bonte vimela ramsay
mahara
trained through the burmese theravada
school in mahasi system of training
but now a declared son of a dean founder
united international buddha dhamma
society 2003
abbott for dhamma sukha meditation
center
study park complex 2005 present official
founder and spiritual head for the
buddhist american forest tradition
new sect bonte is head teacher for
tranquil wisdom insight meditation and
he oversees the research
practice preservation and teaching of
early foundation buddhist teachings as
found in the pali texts
he has been a monk since 1986 with over
40 years of practice and with over 12
years of that in asia
he holds the first lifetime position
given to a representative for buddhists
in the usa
to the world buddhist council based in
kobe japan
2006 questions may be sent to bonte
vimela ramsay via info at damasuca.org
other resources
dhamma sukkah meditation center website
www.damasuka.org
vimala ramsay bonte meditation is life
life is meditation create space 2014
vimela ramsay bonte breath of love
iapasico foundation of indonesia 2012.
vimala ramsay bonte moving dhamma
volume 1 createspace 2012.
johnson david the path to nibana dsmc
publishing
2018 check our website for retreats and
more information
dhammasukha meditation center info
masuka.org
thank you for listening